In a World Full of People
by ItsWhatIWrite
Summary: AU.When Rachel Berry is forced to move to Lima, Ohio after a tragedy...how will she settle into the small town and who will help her cope? Puckleberry! Main Cast.
1. Chapter 1

_Author's note: this is major AU. As for Rachel's parents, I was all for having her two gay dads, but then no matter what way I tried to work it I couldn't have the different family relations I needed for the story. You'll see within a few chapters. I'm really going try and incorporate all the base characters in this story; seeing them get shuffled around and ignored last season was something that really bothered me. And now we have all these glee project winners…blah. Ok, enough of me on my soap box. Off to the story, please review and comment. A few other notes, everybody is a senior and baby-gate didn't happen. _

Chapter One

"Dude, you're legit about to lose your winning streak." Puck cast a sideways glance at his best friend, "last time I kicked your ass this bad you were shitfaced."

Finn dropped the controller and sighed, "remember how I told you about my cousin Rachel?"

"Yeah, the one with the parents who died a couple of days ago?" Of course Puck remembered, he had been kicked out of the Hummel-Hudson house after the phone call Carol had received about her brother and his wife's untimely death.

"Yeah, well she's coming to live with us and she's gonna be here tomorrow morning. She's getting Kurt's room. My mom is like totally freaking out, she says we have so much to do and blah, blah, blah. But the thing is, I kinda need you to do something for me…"

Puck raised a brow, "ok…" How bad could it be? The last time Finn asked him for a favor it was to help him with his history paper on the Holocaust. Yeah, it was crazy depressing and shit, but Noah Puckerman was a good Jew, so of course he knew about the Holocaust.

"Well you see, Rachel is half Jewish or something and my mom thinks it would be good idea if you could maybe take her to Temple at least once."

"Oh come on dude! I mean it sucks that her parents died, but you know my mom has been getting on my ass about finding a good Jewish girlfriend. I show up at Temple, which is hardly ever, with a Jewish girl, my mom will be calling a wedding planner!" He shook his head, "nah man."

"I'm not asking you to ask her out or something," he chuckled, "and even if you did, she would probably say no. She's not really into guys like you. But the point is, she's been through like a lot of drama and stuff…we both know how it is losing a parent, could you imagine losing both?"

Puck and Finn had been best friends since their Pre-K days. When Finn was five, his father died and when Puck was seven, his father left. Their friendship had strengthened over the years because of the obstacles.

Puck shook the controller in front of Finn's face, "first of all, no girl would ever turn down a chance at the Puckerone and second of all," he rolled his eyes, "you're right, losing a parent sucks. I'll at least show her where the Synagogue is and have my ma introduce her to Rabbi Greenburg."

"Thanks man, now if I can just get Quinn to maybe show her around McKinley. She's in our grade, and she's like super smart. I think she won her first ever spelling bee when she was like four or something." Puck snorted, "she's not that bad! She's an only child, she was like, what's that saying, the apple of her parents' eye or something."

"As much as I enjoy your boys' attempt at gossip, I would really appreciate it if you helped me move my stuff up here," Kurt Hummel stood against the door frame of his new room, still rather annoyed with the decision (without his input!) of having to give up his room.

"Oh chill, Beyonce." Puck tossed the x-box controller down and stretched his arms, letting out an over exaggerated grunt. He grabbed his worn out Nike's and shoved them on his feet, not even bothering to fix the laces. "I'm sure Frankenteen here will help you out, but I gotta go. My mom is working the graveyard shift and someone has to watch the brat."

Kurt rolled his eyes, "how convenient. Tell Ellie I said hello and the next time she comes over, I'm prepared for another round of Just Dance. I've been practicing with Brittany and Tina."

* * *

><p>"Oh Rachel sweetie, it's so good to see you!" Sunday morning came and Carol was pulling Rachel into a tight hug the minute she had climbed out of Burt's truck. She brushed the hair from her niece's eyes, "I mean, these obviously aren't the best circumstances. But nonetheless, it's good to see you. How was your flight?"<p>

Rachel put on her best smile, "it was fine, thank you, Carol. The turbulence was a little rough, but I had prepared myself by checking the weather forecast so it was to be expected."

"Well you're on solid ground now, dear." She noticed Rachel's gaze take in the small house and the surrounding residences, "it's a bit smaller than New York City but I'm sure you'll fit right in with the community." She grabbed Rachel's hand, "come on, we'll have the guys carry your stuff in and I'll give you a tour of the house. It's been a while since you've been here."

The newly orphaned teen numbly nodded; it had been a while since she had stepped foot in the house. And although she did have an impeccable memory and could recall where exactly everything was, she just didn't have enough strength to protest to Carol's attempts at making her feel comfortable.

So the rest of Sunday afternoon was spent bringing Rachel's belongings into her new room. After everything had been lugged upstairs, she had insisted she could manage the rest and gave her new family no choice but to go back to whatever they had been doing before she had arrived.

Hours had passed and she had managed to unpack most of her belongings. Her clothes, shoes and whatever other accessories she owned had been put away in the closet off to the far left corner of her new room. The bed had been made for her with what she assumed were new linens, the pale pink and yellow comforter did not scream Finn or Kurt. She added her own pillow that she had brought from home, or what used to be here home. It was a plush gold star, and had obvious wear to it, but she didn't care it was her favorite. She had hugged it tight every night since her parents had died and cried herself to sleep.

She was sitting on the beige carpet and arranging her DVDs in alphabetical and chronological order on the shelves below her new television when there was a light knock on her bedroom door. She mumbled a soft 'come in', assuming it was just her aunt coming to check up on her again.

"Hello."

She looked up, meeting the soft gaze of Kurt Hummel, "hi."

"You mind if I come in?" He smirked, "I'll admit, it's a little weird knocking on the door of my old room."

"Right," she looked back down at her DVDs, "I apologize that you were forced out of your room for me. I imagine it was quite the inconvenience. As a teenager, I know that the bedroom is a place of solitude and individuality and you've been tossed out of yours."

Kurt laughed lightly, "Finn was right, you do talk a lot." He shrugged his shoulders, "and while I was a little upset at first, I was promised the opportunity to update the décor in Finn's room. I don't know if you noticed, but it's absolutely ridiculous."

"Please tell me he did get rid of the cowboy wallpaper?"

"Unfortunately not, but it will be the first to go." He pointed to her DVDs, "great selection. I might have to borrow a few, my boyfriend Blaine doesn't seem to understand the importance of Broadway and show tunes. I've made it my own little mission to change his mind." Kurt plopped down gracefully next to Rachel and crossed his legs, "so what was your first show? You grew up in New York City, so I'm assuming you've seen some shows?"

Rachel smiled fondly at the memory, "I saw _Cats _for my fifth birthday. Did you know Marlene Danielle was the only actress to perform for the show for its entire eighteen year run? If I could manage to make it on Broadway for half that time, I would consider my dreams coming true."

At this, Kurt's interest peaked. The Glee club always in the forefront of his mind, he knew this year they would be one member shy of the regulated twelve members they needed to be considered an actual club. "So you sing?"

"Yeah, but I've decided to put my dreams aside this year and focus intently on my education. Going into a new school will be difficult, especially as a senior and I would really like to keep my G.P.A. at a solid 4.0 so I can receive scholarships and go back to New York."

"You know, Nationals are in New York City this year."

"Nationals for what?"

"Glee Club." He noticed the slight gleam of excitement briefly pass through his new cousin's gaze and took this as a sign to continue, "Finn and I both are. We're like our own group of misfits. Outside of Glee you would never imagine that half of us would even notice each other's presence."

"Well music does have a way of uniting people, my mom always…" she stopped suddenly and recomposed herself, "I suppose it doesn't really matter anymore."

"Of course it does," Kurt whispered. "You know, my mother died when I was twelve."

Rachel nodded, "I'm sorry for your loss."

"Likewise."

"Does it get easier?"

Kurt sighed, "I'm not sure easier is the right choice of word. But," he paused, "I suppose it becomes more manageable in dealing with the grief." He combed his fingers through his hair, "but if you ever wanna talk about it, or Broadway," he motioned to her Vampire Diaries season one DVD, "or about Paul Wesley. I'm all ears."

That night, Rachel Berry clung to her gold star pillow and cried herself to sleep. As far as she was concerned, the grieving would never become manageable.

_This chapter was short, just a bit of an introduction into the main core characters. It's definitely Puckleberry. But like I said, I would like to keep other base characters involved. _


	2. Chapter 2

_Thanks for the reviews, everybody! And to the reviewer who asked, yes Shelby was Rachel's mother. This chapter was just sort of introducing the rest of the characters. Enjoy!_

Chapter Two

Rachel trudged down the steps, how she had managed for Kurt and Finn to convince her of going to King's Island, she'll never know. In fact, she was a little surprised that Kurt was going, from the conversations they'd had thus far, she didn't peg him as a fan for amusement parks.

It had been two days since she had moved to Lima and after she spent her Sunday afternoon unpacking she'd barely had anytime to herself. On Monday morning Carol had insisted on waking her up bright and early for some shopping and later on in the day, some lunch. During the whole entire meal, her aunt kept giving her knowing looks; silently telling her to eat. She tried, and managed to finish off a third of her salad and half of the baguette that came along as a side. She just didn't have much of an appetite anymore.

That evening Kurt had begged to watch some musicals with her and she had agreed. Finn even tried to get her to play some Call of Duty, but that she had politely declined. And now they had managed to get her to come along to King's Island with them; apparently it was some big trip they had planned to end their summer on a high note.

It was almost like everyone within the Hummel-Hudson home had conspired to make sure that she kept busy at all times.

"Hey."

Startled, Rachel looked up, "oh, hello. I'm sorry, I didn't realize there was somebody else here. Finn and Kurt both left to pick up some friends." That was another thing; _friends._ Rachel Berry was not very good at making friends.

Puck couldn't help himself, he was after all, an eighteen year old male. He let his gaze trail her body briefly, just long enough to take in her denim shorts, black flip-flops and her pale pink t-shirt covered in tiny stars. He met her eyes, "I'm Puck." She was one good looking Jew.

"Finn mentioned you, Noah Puckerman, right?"

Puck nodded and turned back to the television, "it's nice to meet you. And uh," he cringed, he should have just stopped at the nice to meet you part. She tilted her head questioningly and waited for him to continue, "I'm sorry to hear about your parents. It sucks."

Rachel smiled sadly, "thanks and we've met before."

"We have?"

She nodded, her hands clasped in front of her, "Finn's tenth birthday party, you threw a balloon filled with cherry coke at me."

"Oh," Puck's thoughts wandered back to the birthday party from so many year ago and distinctly remembered filling cherry coke into several balloons with Mike Chang. But as to who he threw them at, kind of a blur; besides the brown haired girl wearing the purple dress with a big horse in the center of it. He had been sent home after the incident. "Sorry about that."

"It's ok, I've had worse things thrown at me since." She smiled, "my intent was merely to clear up the fact that you thought we hadn't met, not to make you apologize."

"Right, well still I'm sorry. I was kind of a terror as a kid." Noah Puckerman saying 'sorry' twice in a span of just a few seconds? That didn't happen.

"As a kid?" Kurt rolled his eyes as he joined the two in the living room, "you still are a terror."

"I am not!" Puck defended. He turned to Rachel, "I'm a badass, there's a difference."

Rachel couldn't help but smile, "I'm sure there is."

Puck nodded and then stopped suddenly as her words sunk in, was she patronizing him?

Rachel looked around, she noticed the teens that followed closely behind Kurt. They were hunched close together, the two girls were giving her a look of pity that Rachel had grown to absolutely hate.

Kurt cleared his throat and did a half skip backwards toward his best friends, "Rachel, this is Mercedes and this is Tina. They're in Glee Club, too. You can stick with us if you'd like, we're not much of a fan of roller coasters."

Tina scoffed, "speak for yourself, Kurt. I love Roller coasters! Mike and I have made a list of roller coasters we're going to conquer within the next two years. Hopefully a trip to Cedar Point during spring break works out."

Mercedes shook her head, "ignore her, all she does is talk about her boy toy." She ran her hand through her hair, "and as long as it's not a water ride, I'm all up for anything. Kurt here is a little freaked out about anything that goes more than five feet in the air."

"Be that as it may," Kurt tried pull of a glare in his best friends' direction, but failed miserably. He couldn't even pretend to be mad at them; let alone actually ever be mad at them. "It's a rather large group and we eventually end up splitting up, you're welcome to tag along if you'd like."

Rachel smiled, "thank you for the offer." She turned to Mercedes and Tina, "and it's lovely to meet you girls. Kurt has already told me so much about you."

"_Finn," _Quinn whined, tugging on her boyfriend's arm. "I thought we were going to go off on our own for the last few hours. We've had this day planned for weeks now, it's the last week before the start of school and I'd really like to spend the evening watching the fireworks with my _boyfriend._"

"I know, I know," Finn defended, his hands waving up from his side, "but my mom is kinda counting on me, I just can't ditch Rachel."

"I'm not saying ditch her, but I'm just asking you to pawn her off on somebody else for the rest of the evening."

"That's kinda harsh, even for you, Quinn." Puck made his presence known, taking a sip of his mix-it-up slushie (which consisted of every single flavor) he had gotten back by Coney Mall after a quick ride on the Racers with Matt, Mike and Sam.

"Shut it Puckerman," Quinn rolled her eyes, "I'm not trying to be a bitch, but it's our first anniversary and I would just like to spend it with Finn."

Puck rolled her eyes, "Just think, if you guys last so long as to make it to your second anniversary, Rachel will have just mourned the first anniversary of her parents' death." He turned to his best friend, "but don't worry about it, bro. She can hang with me tonight. I'm the only one that didn't come with a girl that has me completely whipped."

Finn felt a twinge of guilt, "You sure, man?"

"Yeah, the midget's not too bad. She talks a lot, but she is one good looking Jew." Yeah, that was it. That was the only reason Puck wanted to spend his evening with his best friend's cousin.

"That's very chivalrous of you, Puck." Kurt raised a questioning brow, "please refrain from trying to jump into her pants while you guys are killing the bad guys in Boo Bashers." He pulled his Coach wallet from his pocket, handing Puck a ten dollar bill, "and try to get her to eat something."

"I didn't say I would babysit her, I said I would hang out with her." But he took the ten, nonetheless. "I'll see you guys back in the parking lot later." Puck pushed his aviators over his eyes and swaggered away to stand outside the women's restroom where he knew Rachel was.

Inside the restroom, Rachel patiently waited for Brittany and Santana; they had dragged her away to the bathroom, mentioning something about the buddy system. And while Rachel firmly believed in the buddy system (she had grown up in one of the biggest cities in the world), she didn't think it was necessary for a third person to attend the restrooms with them.

She stared at herself in the wall length mirror above the rows of sinks and messed with the ends of her hair. She hated looking the mirror; while she wasn't the _hottest _or _sexiest _seventeen year old around (her former classmates had made sure she knew that), she had never been ashamed of her looks. But for the past six days, every time she looked in the mirror she saw her mother.

Santana swung open the door to the stall and cast a glance at Rachel while washing her hands. The Cheerio never took kindly to people intruding in her circle of friends, and she was kind of possessive (ok, she was a lot possessive) but that didn't mean her Lima Heights Adjacent attitude had to rear its ugly head after immediately meeting Rachel Berry.

"Stop messing with your hair, it looks as good as it is going to."

"Oh," Rachel's hands fell, "it's merely just a nervous tactic, and I didn't realize my hair looked bad."

The two waited silently for Brittany. Once the blonde had washed her hands the three left the restroom.

"You're with me, Berry."

The three girls were startled by the mo-hawked teen leaning against the wall. "Excuse me?" Rachel deadpanned. "I believe I have a first name."

Santana rolled her eyes, "whatever, that's just Puck's way of addressing somebody. I mean, the guy doesn't even go by his own name." She eyed Puck carefully, "the thing you should really be worrying about is why he wants to hang out with you."

"That was mean, San." Brittany whispered.

"I didn't mean it like that," Santana defended. "But Puck usually has ulterior motives for hanging out with girls."

"Relax, Satan. You too, _Rachel_. The lovebirds over there want some alone time and I told them you could chill with me tonight, us Jews gotta stick together, right?"

The whole drive from Lima to Mason Puck had slipped in comments about how the both of them were Jewish, at first Rachel didn't mind. In fact, it was a little comforting, some sense of her life—her faith, was still intact. But now it was a little weird, "How do you even know that I'm Jewish?"

"You mean besides the schnoz?" Santana shrugged, "Finnessa probably told him."

"Whatever Satan, just go find your man before he heads back towards the dinosaurs."

"You know, I really don't need a babysitter," Rachel muttered as they started walking off.

Puck smirked, "good. Because the only person I babysit is my sister."

"So you have ever been to a theme park before?" They had been walking for a bit in complete silence as he let Rachel take in the atmosphere around them. She shook her head, "really? Never?"

She shrugged, "besides Coney Island once when I was eleven, no. I was always busy with extra-curricular activities. I've been dancing since I was two, and with singing lessons, piano lessons and the different productions I've done since I was twelve, I've kept a pretty packed schedule."

"Are you like some Broadway star or something?"

"_No_. There's more to the performing arts in New York City than Broadway. I've done a few community theater productions, but I preferred focusing my time on my studies and kept busy with the debate club, glee club and drama club. Colleges don't just look into a possible student's GPA."

Puck smirked, "parents wouldn't let you go for Broadway, would they?" He immediately realized his words were a mistake and the look that passed through Rachel's eyes didn't go unnoticed. "I shouldn't have said that."

"It's fine," she muttered. "But it's true, daddy really wanted me to finish high school and get a degree in something _useful. _And my mother had tried the whole Broadway thing, even making it in a few productions but show business really is a heartless world." She shrugged sadly, thinking back to the several arguments she'd indeed had with her parents when it came to her dreams for herself and their dreams for her. "If my daddy had gotten his way, I'd be a doctor or a lawyer."

Puck chuckled, "my mom is just hoping I can graduate high school." He placed his hand on the small of her back without thinking and guided her towards the line for adventure express.

"Does this ride go upside down?" Rachel asked panicked. "Because I don't think I'm quite prepared for such a feat. And school is something you should really take seriously, Noah."

"Why? It's not like I have anywhere to go."

"Says who?"

"Says Lima, Ohio." He shook his head, "enough of that. This ride is practically a kiddie coaster, you'll do fine. I took my sister on it when she was six, so I think you'll be ok. But if you feel the need to puke, please do it away from me."

She shook her head, "shouldn't be a problem."

"And really, Noah?" Rachel said after a moment of silence, "you're going to let some small town dictate the direction in which the rest of your life should take? While Lima will be my new home for the next ten months, there's no way I'm letting it get in the way of going back to New York."

Slightly annoyed but completely taken off guard, Puck shrugged his shoulders. No one else besides his mother gave him lectures about the possibilities his post-high school life would have. Everybody just kind of assumed he was destined to be a Lima Loser. "I've practically got a huge 'L' in the middle of my forehead, I'm a Lima Loser, babe."

She turned to him, looking up at his face in a serious manner, "I see nothing of the sort. And don't call me 'babe'."

"So where's your cousin? Or step-cousin?" Tina asked out of curiosity and a little worry. The girl talked non-stop, almost like nothing had happened to her. To be honest, it kind of freaked Tina out, if her own parents had died suddenly she would have probably shut the world out and gone on some kind of strike or something.

Kurt sighed, "Puck decided he would hang out with her." He nodded in agreement with the looks Mercedes and Tina gave him, "my thoughts exactly."

"She talks a lot," Tina spoke her thoughts out loud.

Mercedes nodded, "with a lot of big words. I mean, I understand what she's saying but you know Puck is probably wishing he had stolen a pocket dictionary when he ransacked Artie's room last week looking for his math book from last year."

"Finn says she's a lot quieter than she used to be," Kurt took a seat in the back of the pavilion, the two girls following suit. They were going to watch his boyfriend's last ever performance in the small budget musical that King's Island set up every summer. "Carol said the same thing. Everybody deals with things differently." He shrugged, "but she sings. Well not for grief, but she mentioned to me that she sings and she would like to be in Broadway someday."

"She sings?" Mercedes was the known diva of the group, next to Kurt, of course. And while she was all for finding a new group member (because they did need one); she was hoping it would be someone who would be content with fading into the background. "How well?" Kurt shrugged in response. "So maybe she doesn't sing that well."

"It's a possibility," Kurt mused. "But I don't know, there's something hidden within her personality that screams Diva and I for one am totally giddy with excitement."

Tina rolled her eyes, "oh God. Another one? You two are enough to drive me crazy sometimes." She paused, "is it bad that I just don't know how to act around her? I mean, she seems nice enough and I'm sure she's cool…but…I don't know."

"I agree with T, its one thing if we're her friends…but we don't know her."

"But just give her a chance for me?" Kurt begged, "Please?"

"Oh we've already decided to give her a chance," Tina assured him. "It's just going to be weird. The last time a new person fell into our little circle it was the whole Lauren Zizes fiasco." After a beat, "and she kind of scared me."

"Me too," Mercedes slipped her phone back into her purse after a quick text to her boyfriend. "I can't believe she dumped Puckerman right before prom and decided to date what's-his-name from Carmel."

"And to think Puck had practically given his balls away to that girl." Tina shook her head, "oh why do I have a feeling this is going to be quite an interesting year at McKinley?"

"You mean besides the fact that we're seniors and will be ruling the school?" Kurt said.

Mercedes scoffed, "don't get ahead of yourself, boo. We're still gleeks, remember?"

"One can dream, right?"

Tina scoffed, "dream, fantasize, get your hopes up. It all ends in the same deafening crash in the end."

"Way to be optimistic, Tina."

Puck had kept his eyes on Rachel the entire time the roller coaster was in motion. She grasped the handle bars in front of her and absolutely refused to let go. After the first hill, she had squeezed her eyes shut, muttering what he had picked up on as a Jewish prayer. It had sounded vaguely familiar as something his mother used to mumble under breath after yelling at him for doing something stupid.

When it lurched to a final stop and the safety harnesses loosened, he nudged her, "you can open your eyes now."

"Next ride is my choice," she muttered and anxiously climbed out of the coaster seat, jetting off towards the exit; leaving Puck no choice but to scramble out of his own seat and rush to catch up with her.

"Oh come on, that wasn't so bad."

"I'm pretty sure my life flashed before my eyes."

"How is that possible? Your eyes were closed the entire time."

Rachel huffed and crossed her arms, "the point is, I was not prepared for the twists and turns and drops of the ride. I knew I should have done my research this morning before leaving. Can't we just go on the carousel or something?"

Puck spent the next two hours going on every single kiddie ride the amusement park had to offer. But he kinda had fun.

_So I'm not one to beg for reviews or anything, but they really are much appreciated and do make me more motivated to update. And while I did get two chapters out in two days, don't expect that every often. I was going to go the whole 'Rachel and Puck meet and absolutely can't stand each other route', but for some reason the way I have decided to write it seems a bit more natural for this story. Rachel has been subdued since her parents untimely death and motivation, self-confidence and ambition has faltered a bit because of it._ _I hope that all made sense._


	3. Chapter 3

_A/N: thanks for the reviews, alerts and story faves! You guys are super duper! :)_

* * *

><p>Chapter Three<p>

"Can't we just sit here and watch them?"

Puck had just suggested they start making their way over to the Eifel Tower replica; a third of the size of the original, it was a great place to view the fireworks that were shot up over the park right before it closed.

"I guess," he shrugged, "half the fun is being up there, though." He lazily waved his hand up to the top of the building.

A sigh escaped the brunette's lips, "I don't really care for tall buildings."

"You're from New York City, I bet most of the buildings there are tall!"

Rachel scoffed, "Have you ever even been to New York City?" When he didn't respond, she nodded, "didn't think so. New York City, _my home_ is a lot more than just tall buildings, rude people and 24 hour traffic jams. The city has _so_ much more to offer than this horrible town."

It was Puck's turn to scoff, "and _there it is_!"

"There's what?"

"Ever since you moved here, you've basically criticized every little thing about Lima." He shook his head, "I've just been waiting for that big city, snobby attitude to make its appearance. You act like moving to Lima was the worst thing to ever happen to you."

"No, _Puck_, losing my parents was the worst thing to ever happen to me." She grabbed her souvenir bag from the bench hurried away from him, immediately ducking into the group of riders who had just come back from riding Diamondback."

* * *

><p>"You ok, Rachel?" Finn glanced back at his cousin through the rear view mirror.<p>

"I just wanna go home," she whispered.

Finn and Puck had been about ready to locate the park's security and organize a search party for Rachel when she silently slipped into the back of car; ignoring the worried gaze from her cousin, a questioning gaze from Quinn and a guilty set of eyes from Puck. They had all agreed to meet up in the parking lot at closing and Finn nearly attacked Puck when he showed up twenty minutes after the park had closed without Rachel at his side.

Quinn turned around in her seat and nodded at the heartbroken girl before her, "that's where we're headed. The girls are actually all meeting up at Mercedes' house for a little sleepover. She asked me to pass along an invite."

Rachel continued to avoid eye contact as she pulled the seatbelt over her body, "I think I'll pass, but tell Mercedes I appreciate the invite."

"Are you sure? It's going to be a lot of fun. Chick flicks, too much candy and crazy gossip."

"But I wanna go home!" Rachel sobbed, pulling her knees to her chest and ignoring the suffocating effect the seatbelt was having against her mid-section. She buried her face, "I wanna go back to New York!"

The outburst had startled the three other occupants in the car. Quinn quickly removed her seatbelt, "switch seats with me, Puck."

"But…"

Before he could protest, Quinn was out of the car and pulling open the door next to him. "That wasn't a question, Puck." Her eyes softened when she saw the worry in Puck's gaze, "I think it's best, ok?"

"Rachel?" Quinn whispered, sliding into the back seat next to her.

"I don't wanna be here. I shouldn't be here, I should be in New York with my parents and running lines for some stupid audition!" Rachel gasped for air, "I wanna fall asleep to the sounds of the city every night, not to the sounds of my own crying! I want my daddy to come home and promise me he'll make it to my next show even though I know he won't. I want my mom to help me pick out my next audition song and tell me that I'm going to do great." Her breathing became more erratic and her hands reached for her throat, trying to physically will herself to breath. "I don't…I can't brea…"

"Rachel," Quinn said more urgently this time. "Look at me, Rachel."

"Rachel!" Puck exclaimed, his own worries getting the best of him. He turned in his seat, practically climbing over the console between the two front seats.

"Home," Rachel gasped.

"Oh my god," Finn muttered. "She's totally freaking out."

"And you're not helping, dude!"

Finn glared, "you really going to point fingers? Because I'm pretty sure you're the reason she's upset in the first place!"

"Both of you knock it off!" Quinn turned back to Rachel and pulled her face into her hands, "look at me." She refused and struggled for air, "don't fight it, just look at me." How Quinn managed to keep her voice calm, she wasn't quite sure. Rachel's panic struck eyes finally found hers, "you have to calm down." She nodded, "that's right, deep breaths. Good job. Keep going." She nodded towards the boys, still keeping her gaze on the girl in front her, "start driving, Finn."

"What? But shouldn't we like find a doctor or something?"

Quinn shook her head, for once frustrated with her boyfriend's inability to catch on, "just start heading back to Lima." She turned her attention back to Rachel and smiled, the brunette's breathing was back to normal again. "You better now?" Rachel nodded, "good. Are you thirsty?" Another nod. "Puck, have you opened that bottle of water yet?"

"No," He caught Quinn's intent and twisted the cap off and handed it to her. "Here."

Quinn put the bottle to Rachel's lips, "take a drink, it'll help." She tipped the bottle of water up, Rachel's hands still trembling. "There you go."

After a few minutes of silence, Rachel spoke, unable to meet the eyes of the three other passengers in the car, "I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry for," Quinn assured.

"I'm the one that should be apologizing," Puck whispered. Immediately refusing to meet his best friend's gaze and turned back to Rachel, "I shouldn't have said those things. I'm kind of a douche."

Finn turned out of the parking lot, looking at his cousin before turning his gaze to his best friend, "what the fuck, man?"

Puck shook his head, "later, dude."

They had been driving in silence the whole way home besides the faint sound of the radio that kept going in and out of station ranges. "She's ok, right?" Finn asked as he navigated the dark roads of Lima, he repeated his earlier words, "I mean, should we like take her to a doctor or something?"

Quinn shrugged, "she was definitely hyperventilating, but she's been asleep for the past hour and a half. You're call."

"If you call that sleeping, I'd hate to see what you would call having a nightmare." Puck shook his head, "we can swing by my house and my mom can check her out, just to make sure."

"What's this?" Quinn whispered, "Puck suddenly has a heart?"

"Shut it, Fabray." His gaze softened as it turned to Rachel, "I was the one that spent all afternoon with her, not you guys. She barely ate today and then she had that crazy panic attack."

Quinn muttered something under her breath before pulling her cell phone out and texting Mercedes that she would be a little late to her house. The rest of the drive to Puck's house was made in complete silence.

"Ma," Puck whispered, shaking his mother awake. "Wake up, Ma." He didn't have to explain much for his mom to jump out of bed, pull her robe tight around her and rush downstairs to the living room where the three other teens were.

Rachel was awake and supporting her head with her hand, her elbow resting against the arm of the couch when Dana walked into the living room. Finn and Quinn were cuddled together at the other end of the couch, both of their tired gazes worriedly focused on Rachel.

"Rachel, sweetie?" Dana squatted down so she was at eye level with the teen, she touched Rachel's knee, effectively getting her attention. "I'm Dana, Noah's mom. How are you feeling?"

"I'm tired." She looked around, slightly disoriented, "I thought we were going to Mercedes' house?"

"We are," Quinn chimed in. "We thought we'd let Ms. Puckerman look you over first."

"Why? I'm fine."

"Well let's just make sure, ok?" She reached for Rachel's wrist, "I'm going to take your pulse, ok?"

After taking the teen's pulse and blood pressure, Dana frowned and sat down next to her. "Your blood pressure is a little low. I'm not concerned enough to send you to the hospital but when was the last time you ate?"

Rachel shrugged, "this morning."

She raised a brow, not eating or drinking was not healthy at all, but not eating or drinking while spending the entire day out in the hot August weather was almost asking for admittance to a hospital. But now was not the time to go into that lecture, "You're dehydrated, hungry and you most likely had a panic attack. Do these happen often?"

Rachel pulled away from Dana, "Can I go home?"

"Rachel," Finn interrupted, "we can't take you back to New York."

Her bottom lip trembled, "I know."

Dana sighed, "I need you to answer my questions, Rachel. Otherwise I'll have no choice but to call your aunt where she'll most likely arrange for you to be admitted to the hospital for observation." The brunette shied away from the three sets of worried eyes, "at least eat something, ok?"

"Sometimes," she admitted. "Can I have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich?" she asked in a childlike manner.

Puck caught his mother's gaze, "I'm on it." Finn mumbled something about helping and quickly followed Puck to the kitchen.

Rachel sniffled and wiped her tears with the back of her hand. What the hell was wrong with her? Why was she acting so erratic? One minute she was forgetting her worries and having a good time. Then the next she knew, she was crying so hard she couldn't breathe.

Her vision blurred as a fresh batch of tears threatened to fall, "what's wrong with me?"

"You're in mourning sweetie, it's perfectly normal to cry," Dana tried to reason with the young girl.

"But I had fun today and I shouldn't have! My parents just died and I was laughing and having fun! What kind of daughter am I?"

"You're a daughter who has just had her whole entire world turned upside down, it's perfectly normal to be feeling so many different kinds of emotions and finding yourself conflicted." Dana moved to the empty spot next to Rachel and rubbed her back, "is there anything else I can get you?"

"My mom," she whispered, surprising even herself with the heart-wrenching answer.

* * *

><p><em>AN2: review? please? Suggestions and criticism (constructive) is always welcome. :)_


	4. Chapter 4

_Here's the next chapter! Once again, thanks for all the reviews and I hope people continue **reading **and **reviewing. **I know before some of you mentioned wanting see what would happen when Rachel finally did sing and blow the Glee club away. Well, that will be next chapter (and it's almost all done). After last night's episode I had to make some tweaks, it gave me a few fresh ideas. Anyways, here you go! I tried to make it longer but it just felt like a good place to end the chapter at. _

Chapter Four

Rachel spent the next two days effectively avoiding everybody in and outside of her new _home._ Carol was constantly checking in on her, but Rachel would only respond to her aunt's fussing with curt answers. She only left her room to get something to eat (even then, the food she consumed was nowhere near what she should be eating) or go to the bathroom.

While she was sure Puck's mom had informed her aunt on what had happened Monday night, thankfully her aunt had yet to actually mention anything specific.

At one point she'd even heard Finn and Kurt arguing in hushed tones outside her door; but she hadn't been able to make out what they were arguing about. Probably the best tactic on trying to coax her out of her bedroom, those two never seemed to be able to see eye to eye on anything. So it wasn't surprising when she heard an annoyed huff from Kurt and the sounds Finn's big feet hitting the carpeted hallway before eventually fading.

She'd received more than a handful of text messages from numbers she didn't even know; she didn't even bother reading them. She had assumed they were from Kurt and Finn's friends. They weren't her friends, so it wasn't really necessary for them to feel obligated to play the sympathy card and see how she was doing.

She rolled over and her eyes fell on the only picture she had set up in her room; it was of her and her parents on her seventeenth birthday. She was grinning from ear to ear, her mother on her left and her father on her right. They had surprised her with tickets to _Wicked! _The one musical she had been dying to see for years. She swallowed the lump in her throat and pushed the picture face down. How could she do that? How could she go out and have a decent time at some amusement park when her parents had only been dead for a week? What kind of daughter was she? Maybe if she'd been a good daughter and paid more attention to them instead of insisting they pay attention to her…then just maybe they'd still be around. If she hadn't insisted they go to her stupid dance recital.

No, she resigned herself to the fact that she was going to shut the world out and grieve.

And her way of grieving? Burying herself under her covers and grasping her gold star pillow as if she'd been tossed a life preserver. As far as she could tell though, she was still drowning.

Bright and early Thursday morning, Kurt barged through her bedroom door and yanked the covers away from her. "Rise and shine!"

"Kurt!" she yelled angrily. She'd been awake; since five, actually. She huffed and pulled the covers back up, "couldn't you at least have some courtesy and knock?"

His hands placed on his hips, he raised a brow, "I've been knocking for two days." He smoothed out a spot on the edge of her bed and sat down; crossing one leg over the other and clasping his hands on top of his knees, he gave her a sympathetic look. "You need to get out of bed."

"I need to do no such thing."

"Ok, I really didn't want to have to be rude, but you smell and you look a hot mess. I'm not going to pretend I don't know what happened Monday night on the way back from Kings Island because the group of people you found yourself in like to gossip."

She shrugged, "gossip doesn't bother me in the least bit." _That was a total lie. _Ok, so gossip did bother her, but it was nothing new to her.

"Good girl, you'll have to not let it bother you while attending McKinley." He tugged on her blanket, "but really honey, you've got to get out of bed and at least take a shower." He clapped his hands together, "I've got plans for us today."

"Does it involve glitter?" she mumbled, throwing her arm over eyes, "because if so, then I'm not interested."

"Ok, I'm going to try really hard not to take offense for that but if you don't get yourself out of this bed right this instant, then I'll…I'll…" he tripped over his words unable to come up with an actual threat. "Well then I'll be forced to bring in reinforcements."

She lowered her arm just enough to meet his eyes, "in case you've forgotten, I just moved here. And I assume by reinforcements you are referring to friends. I would need those first."

"You really know how to put yourself down, don't you?" Quinn had honestly had every intent on spending the day with her boyfriend but the minute she had entered the Hummel-Hudson house she was ambushed by Kurt. The soft spot she had developed for her boyfriend's cousin had betrayed her and now she was completely in on Operation: Get Rachel Berry out of her Funk (Kurt's name, not hers).

"Quinn? What are you doing here?"

She shrugged, "I heard a rumor that you don't own a single pair of jeans. We're going to change that. With legs like yours, you'd kill in a pair of skinny jeans. Not to mention, I know a few boys who would fall over for you…one in particular."

Rachel rolled her eyes; she had caught Kurt snooping through her closet her first evening in Lima. And while he had claimed he was looking for some piece of clothing that he was sure had left in there, she knew otherwise. Kurt wasn't exactly subtle when it came to his intentions, the fashionista was totally snooping on her wardrobe.

"I'm really not in the mood to go shopping and by tagging along I would just be bringing down the morale of rest of the group."

"Rest of the group?" Kurt questioned. "Honey, it's just us."

_Right. _How could she have let it slip her mind, she didn't have friends. "Nonetheless, I'd rather not go."

"So you'd rather just hide in your room until Monday morning when school starts?"

"That is my intent."

"Well it's unacceptable," Kurt huffed. He marched over to Rachel and dragged her out of bed, "you're showering."

While Rachel showered, Quinn and Kurt ransacked her closet.

"Well it's not as bad as I thought," Quinn muttered.

"Are you kidding me? There's an atrocious amount of plaid skirts in here." Kurt's fingers flipped through the bottom rack of clothes. "Thankfully I see no cheerleading skirts in here."

"Hey," Quinn defended, turning her gaze to Kurt, "I thought the cheerleading remarks were going to be kept at a minimum?"

Kurt rolled his eyes, "my apologies."

While Kurt's plan to get Rachel out of her room hadn't gone exactly as he had expected, he could still see that it had done his cousin some good. And a good amount of shopping had been done, there had been more than a few disagreements between Rachel and Kurt on what she should and shouldn't buy but besides that, it had been a smooth shopping trip. In Quinn's opinion, it had been a great trip, she'd picked up a few things for herself, a few shirts for Finn (God forbid he be forced to go shopping, and seriously, if she saw him wearing one more ringer t-shirt she just might scream), and she'd gotten Rachel to buy three pairs of jeans.

The three were currently seated in the food court, all sipping on their smoothies and Rachel tried to stay focused on what Quinn and Kurt were saying. They were giving her the lowdown on anything and everything that was McKinley High School.

"Oh, and don't even get me started on Jewfro?"

Rachel swallowed the strawberry and banana concoction and gave the two teens and appalled look, "Jewfro? I'm sorry, but I find it just a tad bit offensive."

Quinn waved off Rachel's words, "don't be, Puck actually came up with the nickname. His name is Jacob Ben Israel, McKinley's number one pervert." She shuddered, "you wouldn't believe how many times I'd return to the girls' locker room after cheer practice only to find my underwear gone."

Kurt nodded, "he is a total creep and he has his own blog. He actually outed me," he rolled his eyes and crossed his legs, "not that it wasn't already obvious."

"I'm sure the creeps can't be much worse than my old high school," Rachel commented quietly. "Unfortunately, I was an easy target for ridicule."

"Oh honey, you'll fit right in at glee club. We're all easy targets, but we're a family and we stick together. If one gets shoved into the locker, you can guarantee the rest of the club has their back."

"Sup guys?" Without waiting for an invite, Puck grabbed a chair from the empty table next to them and slid it over to their table. He turned it around and sat on it backwards, "how's it going?"

Rachel tensed and looked away, she left the question to be answered by someone else. Kurt plastered a smile on his face, "oh you know, back to school shopping."

"What are you doing here?" Quinn asked, giving him a suspicious look. "The mall isn't exactly the place you prefer to spend your afternoons."

He shrugged, "my mom had the day off and decided she'd take Ellie and I shopping for school stuff. They're in Justice right now, gotta say, it's not really my place to shop."

Kurt rolled his eyes, "really? Is there any place you shop at besides Seven Eleven?"

"Chill Beyoncé." He looked over at Rachel, "hey."

"Hello," Rachel answered.

"Listen…" Puck started.

"There he is! I found him!" Ellie ran over to her big brother and tackled him, "we've been looking for you!"

Dana Puckerman's scowl fell from her face the minute she saw the brunette who'd had the nervous breakdown in her house just a few days ago, "oh hey guys." She greeted Quinn and Kurt before turning her attention to Rachel. "Hello dear, how are you feeling?"

"I'm fine, thank you. And how are you?" Rachel could feel the older woman trying to read her.

"I'm good, I didn't realize Noah left us to meet up with some friends."

"We're actually getting ready to leave, I promised Carol we'd be home for dinner." Kurt glanced at his watch for emphasis, "so we should probably get going." The two girls followed Kurt's lead and stood up and grabbed their bags.

"Well ok," Dana nodded, "tell Carol I said hi."

Kurt nodded, "will do."

"It was nice seeing you again, Ms. Puckerman."

Quinn looped her arm with Rachel's and gave Puck a mean look, "we really must be going."

* * *

><p>Puck hardly ever knocked on the front door of the Hummel-Hudson residence; he'd usually just let himself in through the side gate and through back patio door that led right into the living room. But he wasn't here to see Finn, he was here to pick up Rachel and take her to Temple. He was sticking to his word. If he was honest with himself, this was the first time ever (like ever!) that he was somewhat excited to wake up early on a Saturday morning for Temple.<p>

He was even wearing a new green polo and a pair of new jeans; he never really had to try to impress girls in the past. But this was Rachel; she had told him he wasn't a Lima Loser and he'd be damned if he'd cause her to start thinking otherwise. Ok, so maybe his mom had bought him the clothes the other day when his grandmother sent her annual back to school money for him and his sister. But still, he put the outfit together.

And of course his mom was over the moon. Since Monday she was constantly bringing the petite brunette into conversation. _'How is she coping with her parents' death?' 'Carol told me the details of her parents' death, that's just awful.' 'I really hope she is eating right.' 'I noticed the Star of David necklace she had on the other night.' 'You were very sweet with her, Noah.' 'You should invite her over for dinner sometime, I'm sure she'd love a traditional Jewish meal.' _And then when they ran into her at the mall on Thursday, his mom's antics had been upped. She'd noticed the tension between him and the other three teenagers and had been on his case about what had happened.

Rachel stood on the other side of the door and took a deep breath, she was only doing this because it was the only Temple in Lima and a part of her felt maybe getting back in touch with her faith would help deal with her pain.

Just as he was about to knock again, the door swung open. "Good morning, Noah."

He pushed his aviators up into his mohawk, "You ready?"

She nodded, "almost. I just have to brush my teeth." She moved aside to let him in, "I'd say to make yourself at home but you practically do that already."

"You know me too well," he joked.

"Hardly," she mumbled before hurrying away to the bathroom down the hall.

The first few minutes of the drive were in complete silence. Puck cleared his throat and snuck a quick glance in Rachel's direction. She kept her focus away from him.

"I know you've met my mom before, twice actually, but I thought I'd warn you, she's really excited that you're coming with me."

"Why?" Rachel turned away from the window and looked across the bench of the truck and over at him.

"You're a good lookin' Jewish girl." He smirked at the red that crept into her cheeks, "and she'll probably invite you over for a brunch. And," he poked her shoulder playfully, "if you knew what was in your best interest, you won't turn her offer down."

"And of course I only care about what's in my best interest, right? I'm a stupid and selfish New Yorker, that's what we do."

And there it was, Puck had been waiting for the right time to bring up their conversation they'd had at Kings's Island. She'd put up a front the minute she pulled open her front door and let him in, only giving him simple answers and not looking him directly in the eyes. He really needed to apologize to her, but apologies never came easy for Noah Puckerman.

"Rach…"

"My name is Rachel," she interrupted. She crossed her arms defensively, "I don't know how many nicknames you have to run through before you finally get it through your thick skull of yours!" She honestly didn't mind nicknames, as long as they weren't derogatory or insulted her features. Her nose was a popular target at her hold school. But something about hearing _Rach _coming from someone else's lips that weren't her mother's left her emotions crumbling.

The rest of the drive was made in silence and when Puck pulled into the parking spot, Rachel was jumping out of the truck before he even killed the engine. He rolled his eyes and climbed out of the driver's seat and met her around the front of the truck. "Didn't realize you were in that much of a hurry."

"I'm in a hurry to get away from you."

After the service, Rachel was back in Puck's truck, still not talking to him. But her features were definitely more relaxed; the service had done some good. Just like Puck had said, his mother was a little overbearing and had invited Rachel over for lunch. But Rachel had gone against Puck's suggestion and politely turned down the invite.

When Puck's truck rumbled to a stop outside of her house, Rachel removed her seatbelt and pulled the metal latch to push open the door. She froze when she felt Puck's hand grab her arm, "can't you just wait for like, two seconds?"

Rachel glanced over her shoulder, "thanks for inviting me, Noah. I'm sure my aunt set this up or something and it was quite a lovely service." She looked down at his hand on her arm, "now if you wouldn't mind letting go of me, I'd appreciate it."

"Just wait for a second, ok?" When she reluctantly nodded, he released his hand from her, ignoring the loss of warmth his fingers felt. "It was actually Finn." He tilted his head thoughtfully, thinking back to the conversation he'd had with his best friend, "but I think he did mention something about his mom asking him to ask me. I was too stoked with the fact that I was beating his ass in Call of Duty to pay attention to what he was saying."

"I'm not surprised." She looked straight ahead, focusing her gaze to the next house down from hers, where the Carlisle Family was piling into their minivan. She smiled sadly as she watched Mrs. Carlisle scoop her youngest daughter up and help her into the minivan.

"Rachel?" Puck whispered. "You ok?"

"No," her bottom lip trembled and she shook her head. "I miss them."

"I'm sorry."

She took a shaky breath, "It's not your fault." _It's mine._

"No," Puck sighed and drummed his fingers nervously on the steering wheel, "I'm sorry for what I said. I didn't mean it." He scratched the back of his mohawk, "I'm totally not good with apologies or words for that matter. But I'm sorry, ok?" He leaned over to reach for the glove compartment, startling Rachel. He smirked, "relax, I'm just getting something." He dug around and found the C.D. He handed it to her, "here."

She took it and looked up at him questioningly, "what's this?"

"My ma always tells me I'm better at saying I'm sorry with actions." He nodded to the C.D. "Just pop that in your C.D. player the next time you can't fall asleep. All the files are convertible too, so you can burn them onto your computer and transfer them to your iPod."

Rachel nodded and slipped the C.D. into her purse. She thanked Puck again before climbing out of his truck and disappearing into her house.

He really hoped she'd listen to it, and he really hoped she'd make it to track eight.


	5. Chapter 5

_AN: Don't own glee nor do I own any of the songs featured in this chapter. _

Chapter Five

Monday morning snuck up on Rachel, and for once in her life she could honestly say she was not looking forward to her first day of school. But as always, she was prepared. She had picked out her outfit the night before (a purple and black plaid skirt with a simple, white button up blouse. She'd forgone a pair of white knee socks when she realized they had all been confiscated from her dresser. Kurt!). She'd placed her new notebooks, pens, pencils and other materials needed in her book bag from last year and sat it by her bedroom door.

When she'd left her room, she was slightly startled to see Kurt pacing the space in front of her door. He'd stopped in front of her, looked her up and down and gave her half of an approval. If they weren't so behind on time, she's pretty sure he would have dragged her back in her room and forced to her completely change her outfit.

Apparently breakfast on the first day of school was some kind of tradition of her new family. Carol had made a meal that was big enough to probably feed a small country and Burt had probably single-handedly eaten half of it by himself. She ate her meal in silence, picking at the food that had been placed before her. The four around her talked excitedly about the day's plans. Finn was busy discussing the upcoming football season with Burt and how he was almost a shoe-in for starting quarterback. Across from her, Kurt was in a deep conversation with Carol about drama club and the rumor that they would be performing West Side Story this year, and he just had to get a leading role. This was his senior year after all. They'd all tried to get Rachel to join their conversations but she couldn't bring herself to say more than just a few words here and there.

A family meal was just so new to her. In New York, she would grab some carry-out on her way home from a show or practice and take it straight to her room to eat. Her father was hardly ever home before eight and her mother was usually busy in her office with work she'd brought home.

"So what do you think?" Puck asked, meeting Rachel's stride and watched her take in the small town high school. "I bet it's nothing like the big city." He hadn't seen Rachel since Saturday and while asking her about the C.D. had been the first thing he wanted to do the minute he saw her climb out of the passenger seat of Kurt's car, he refrained himself.

Rachel smiled and shook her head, "it's very…small? For a lack of a better word." She held her folder of important transcripts and papers that she had to take to the administrative office close to her; almost as if she were afraid the late summer Midwest wind would blow them away.

"So where are Finn and Quinn?"

He followed her gaze to the couple and rolled his eyes, they had turned into the parking lot right after she and Kurt did, but had yet to leave Finn's car. "Are they always like that?" she asked.

"Unfortunately." He nodded at the small container in her hands, "what's that?"

"Cookies for Mercedes," she looked down at the container, "I wanted to apologize to her for turning down the invite to her house the other night. I had the sudden burst of energy last night to do some baking, so I made some of my famous sugar cookies."

He cocked a brow, "famous, huh? If they're so famous then how is it I've never heard of them?"

Despite her best efforts, Rachel laughed. "Well you have now, haven't you?" She spotted Mercedes and Matt up ahead, "Mercedes!" She waved when the girl turned around.

"Hey girl, I hope you're feeling better. Quinn said one of the rides made you sick…"

"Yeah about that," Rachel smiled apologetically, "I'm really sorry I had to turn down your invite, it was rude of me to do so, especially last minute. I'm sure you had planned accordingly for a certain amount of people. So here," she stretched her arms and held the container out for Mercedes.

Mercedes raised a brow, "what are these?"

"Sugar cookies, my way of apologizing; I wasn't quite sure what your favorite color was so there is an assortment of icing colors."

"Thanks, but you didn't have to apologize." She opened the container and smiled, "and they even say I'm sorry?" She took the one with purple icing and took a bite, her eyes widened, "Oh Jesus, these are delicious."

Both Matt and Puck reached their hands towards the container but Rachel swatted their hands away, "those aren't yours. You'll have to ask Mercedes." She smiled politely at the two boys, "now if one of you could appoint me in the direction of the administrative offices, I would really appreciate it."

Puck grinned, "If I show you, will you make me some 'Thank you' cookies? And for future reference, my favorite colors are blue and red." He turned his head away and pointed in the opposite direction in which Rachel was facing, "the administrative offices are-"

A loud shriek echoed through the hallway and he felt the side of his face go cold as he caught the end of a slushie facial.

"It's always fun getting fresh meat," Karofsky smirked as he aggressively bumped his shoulder into Puck's. He headed down the hall, a few football buddies by his side. When he was within a safe distance away from a still shocked Puck, he turned around, "welcome to McKinley, ho!"

Matt and Mercedes had a hell of a time holding Puck back. If it hadn't been for the sobbing girl in front of him pulling him from his anger, he would have beaten the shit out of Karofsky. His worry for Rachel outweighed his anger to punch Karofsky.

He touched her arm, "Rachel?"

She pushed his hands away, "don't."

"I got this," Mercedes grabbed Rachel's arm and led her to the girl's locker room. She activated her Bluetooth, immediately calling Kurt and notifying him of the first slushie incident of the school year. Within five minutes, Kurt and every girl from glee club was closing off the girls locker room from other students.

Kurt scrubbed the red dye from Rachel's face while both Tina and Mercedes worked on her hair. Brittany stood guard at the door while Quinn and Santana rummaged through their cheer bags, putting together a new outfit for Rachel.

"You guys act like this is a normal occurrence." Rachel mumbled.

Kurt removed the wash towel from Rachel's face, "unfortunately it is."

"I don't get it," she whispered. "I mean, I've had other things thrown at me before, but a _slushie_?" There was an unspoken response, everybody in the locker room either shrugging her just shaking their head. Rachel took a deep breath, "I really appreciate this, I know you're probably all missing your first class because of me and I feel horrible that..."

"Berry!" Santana interrupted, tossing Rachel a pair of gray skinny jeans.

"Yes?"

"You could have just said thank you."

Brittany grinned from her spot at the door, she'd been working on her new cheer moves, "does this mean we get thank you cookies now?"

Rachel smiled, catching the blonde's eye through the mirror, "sure. I'll make some as soon as I get home." She hadn't quite figured Brittany out yet, but the girl was obviously too nice to really be mean to.

"Yes! Can you make mine in shapes of unicorns and one in the shape of Lord Tubbington?"

Rachel looked back at Brittany, completely confused. She was about ready to ask her who exactly Lord Tubbington was when Kurt spoke, "just go with it." She nodded and caught Quinn giving her a reassuring smile.

Her first five classes went rather smoothly compared to how she started her morning at McKinley High. None of Kurt or Finn's friends were in her fifth period class so she was left to herself in an assigned seat right in front of the football player who had thrown a slushie at her. She'd spent the whole fifty minutes of the class leaning forward as far as she could to the point that she was pretty sure the desk left a mark across her stomach.

Kurt had given her strict instructions to go to her locker after fourth period and he would meet her there so they could head to the cafeteria together. She had intended to do just that, but Karofsky had been cat calling her and she ducked into the crowded hallway and headed in the opposite direction of her locker. For once, her stature had come in handy and she was able to slip away from him pretty quickly.

Rachel soon found herself outside the double doors that led to the auditorium; it had been her sanctuary, a safe haven, at her old high school. Standing on her tip toes she was just able to peer through the small glass window into the auditorium. It was empty. She took one last glance around her, surveying the now nearly empty hallway and pushed the door open to the auditorium.

She let the door slam shut behind her and took in the small auditorium, it wasn't as vast, glamorous and well lit as other auditoriums she'd performed in but it held a little spark that she couldn't help but admire. Her hands grazed the worn fabric of the folding seats as she walked down the main aisle and stopped before the stage. With one last sweep of the auditorium with her brown eyes, she ran up the steps and to the center of the stage. It was small, about a fourth of the size of some of the stages she'd embraced in the past.

The lights were dimmed and the only light sneaking in through the auditorium was from the high windows that separated it from the hallway. The darker, the better, Rachel thought. In the darkness, she found the center of the stage and sat down.

After leaving his class, Puck had been in a mad dash to be one of the first students in the cafeteria but as soon as he saw Karofsky calling after Rachel, his plans had changed. For a split second he was torn between beating the shit out of the football player or following Rachel. Ah screw it, he could beat the shit out of the douche bag any day. He ignored the yells from Mike and Matt and weaved his way through the crowd trying to keep up with Rachel. He always thought being tall gave someone more of an advantage in crowds, but damn, Rachel was about to prove him wrong.

When he saw her go into the auditorium, he made a detour and snuck in through the back entrance. He was about to make his presence known when he froze as soon as the first note left her. He'd never heard anything like it before. Yeah, everybody in glee club could hold a note, but wow. Shit, this was Lima, Ohio, he wasn't sure a beautiful voice like that belonged in this cow town.

_Mother you had me  
>But I never had you<br>I wanted you  
>But you didn't want me<br>So I, I just got to tell you  
>Goodbye, goodbye<em>

He continued to listen to her and felt a weird feeling in the pit of his stomach. It was like somebody was tickling him, but on the inside of his stomach. Shit, did that make sense? He tried to shake the feeling, Noah Puckerman didn't get butterflies. He focused back in on her voice.

_Father you left me  
>But I never left you<br>I needed you  
>But you didn't need me<br>So I, I just got to tell you  
>I Gotta tell you<br>Goodbye, goodbye_

_Children don't do  
>What I have done<br>I couldn't walk  
>But I tried, I tried to run<br>So I, I just got to tell you  
>I Gotta tell you<br>Goodbye, goodbye_

_Mama don't go  
>Daddy come home<br>Mama don't go  
>Daddy come home<br>Ma…_

Puck watched Rachel crumble right before his eyes and something inside of him twisted. "Don't stop." It was so quiet and he hadn't meant to say it out loud. But when he saw Rachel's shoulders tense and a sob catch in her throat, he knew he had.

Rachel hurriedly rubbed her eyes and looked up, already knowing the source of the voice but needing to confirm her thoughts anyways. "Noah?" she cleared her throat, "what are you doing here?"

"You're voice is amazing," he discarded his book bag next to hers and sat down across from her, "I mean, shit, I've never heard anybody sing that awesome. No wonder you were pissed to have to leave New York, you were probably five seconds away from taking over the city."

She brushed the back of her hand across her face, slightly embarrassed with the tears, "I'm assuming that was supposed to be a compliment."

"Hell yeah."

Rachel nodded and brushed her bangs from her eyes. "You didn't answer my question," she said after a minute.

"Saw you sneak through the doors and wanted to see what was up." He shrugged, "nobody sneaks around this building during lunch without me knowing about it." _Actually, I saw Karofsky following you and wanted to make sure you were ok and all. _

She smiled, "well you are the resident badass so I suppose it only makes sense."

He laughed, "glad you're catching on." He paused, "so John Lennon, huh?"

Rachel shook her head, "while he did write it and originally perform it, I've modeled my version after Barbra's."

"Barbra?"

She gasped, "you don't know who Barbra is? Oh my goodness."

He shook his head, this chick must be important, Kurt is always mentioning some Barbra woman during glee. He'd have to google her during seventh period while he was in his basic computer programming class. Mr. Edwards didn't give a shit what went on during the class, he'd pull up the projector with some lame ass assignment that Puck could practically do in his sleep and let them go. He and Artie would always try to race to see who could get done first and then they'd spend rest of the period doing whatever they pleased. It was just a shame the school had such difficult parental controls for the internet.

"Unless you're referring to a Nascar driver, someone from _Jackass, _a football player or some kind of cartoon character, Puck isn't exactly the guy to understand pop culture references." Kurt abandoned his bag in the small pile that had built up and sat down next to the two. He looked pointedly at Rachel, "I thought we were going to meet at your locker and head to lunch together?"

Rachel smiled apologetically, "Sorry, I found myself distracted."

He shrugged and waved off her apology, "none needed. I was honestly just a little worried." His brow narrowed, "I wasn't sure if you'd been slushied again."

"No," Rachel shook her head, she stopped herself from adding that she was basically chased down the hall by Karofsky, though. "I just needed some time to think."

He didn't totally believe her but let it go for now. "Well let's get at least get something to eat," Kurt jumped up and held his hand out for Rachel, giving her a stern look, "don't think I didn't notice how you barely touched breakfast this morning."

Rachel ignored the worried look Puck threw her way when Kurt mentioned her irregular eating habits. "Fine, just please, no slushies." She attempted to joke and picked her book bag up, throwing it over her shoulder.

After school had come to an end, Rachel followed Kurt and Finn into the choir room after stopping at her locker for the last time that afternoon. Kurt drove her to school, so he was her ride home but they wouldn't be leaving until after Glee practice.

"So are you going to join?" Kurt pressed.

"Hold up," Santana put her hand up in protest after she heard Kurt's question, "she has to at least audition."

Rachel shook her head, "That won't be necessary. I have no intent on joining glee club I'm just here because Kurt is my ride home. If it's a problem, I can go to the library and study."

"That's not what she meant," Kurt rushed to explain, giving Santana a slight glare. "She just meant that if you were to join, which I think you totally should…then you would have to audition."

"How do we even know she can sing?" Santana countered. Ok, so she'd already decided this Berry girl was ok, but this was Glee and they were looking to go to Nationals. There just wasn't anytime to mess around.

Puck smirked from his usual seat in the back of the choir room, he was slouched down and arms crossed; ready for the shock that the rest of glee was going to be in for. He was actually really excited for the glee club meeting today, shit like this was exciting. And maybe a part of him was hoping he'd get to hear Rachel sing again.

"Oh I can sing," Rachel defended, somewhat insulted that the Latina would make such a comment. "It's just not at the top of my list of priorities at the moment. This is a new school and it's my senior year, I'd really like to focus on my studies."

Santana smirked, "I rest my case. She can't sing."

"Fine!" Rachel stood up, nobody questioned Rachel Barbra Berry's singing ability. "I'll sing. But it's not an audition." She marched over to the piano and slid gracefully onto the bench. She turned slightly, "I'm sure some of you might recognize this, especially those of you who know anything about Broadway." She sent a half smile Kurt's way before turning back and focusing her attention back on the piano.

Her fingers caressed the keys to the piano softly, getting a feel for the instrument in front of her.

Kurt gasped silently from his seat, immediately recognizing the tune, "Oh my gaga."

_Something has changed within me  
>Something is not the same<br>I'm through with playing by the rules  
>of someone else's game<em>

_Too late for second guessing_  
><em>Too late to go back to sleep<em>  
><em>It's time to trust my instincts<em>  
><em>Close my eyes and leap<em>

Her fingers continued to dance across the keys and she closed her eyes, her voice not once wavering.

_It's time to try  
>defying gravity<br>I think I'll try  
>defying gravity<br>Kiss me goodbye  
>I'm defying gravity<br>and you won't bring me down..._

_I'm through accepting limits_  
><em>'cause someone says they're so<em>  
><em>Some things I cannot change<em>  
><em>But 'til I try I'll never know<em>

_Too long I've been afraid of_  
><em>Losing love I guess I've lost<em>  
><em>Well if that's love<em>  
><em>It comes at much too high a cost<em>

_I'd sooner buy_  
><em>Defying gravity<em>  
><em>Kiss me goodbye<em>  
><em>I'm defying gravity<em>  
><em>I think I'll try<em>  
><em>Defying gravity<em>  
><em>And you won't bring me down...<em>

_I'd sooner buy_  
><em>Defying gravity<em>  
><em>Kiss me goodbye<em>  
><em>I'm Defying gravity<em>  
><em>I think I'll try<em>  
><em>Defying gravity<em>  
><em>And you won't bring me down,<em>  
><em>Bring me down<em>

_Oh Ohhh Oohhh_

"The High F!"

"Damn."

"What the fuck?"

"Is she blind like Stevie Wonder? Because she played the piano with her eyes close."

"Oh."

"Wow."

"Thank you Jesus."

"Nationals here we come!"

"Suck it Vocal Adrenaline!"

"I wonder if she can dance as well as she can sing."

Rachel hesitated before removing her hands from the keys and resting them in her lap. She took in their reactions from her voice and bit back her bottom lip; afraid if opened her mouth to say something a really embarrassing sob would escape. That had been the first time she had actually let herself really sing since her parents had died.

It was now creeping up on two weeks and she still couldn't bring herself to truly get back into the routines of everyday life.

She had her moments; they were like spurts of energy. Only the energy led to her doing something that she wouldn't allow herself to do for fear of feeling some sort of happiness. Like baking, last night when she had backed those cookies for Mercedes it had only been after she spent three hours sitting in her closet and crying her eyes out.

Mr. Schuester started clapping and slowly the whole glee club followed suit, Rachel finally looked up.

"That was amazing, Rachel. I really hope you'll change your mind and consider joining the glee club. We could definitely use another powerhouse performer." Will Schuester honestly couldn't remember the last time a student walked through his choir room with a voice like that.

"Thanks," the unshed tears visible to her audience, "but I'm going to have to politely decline." She took a moment and scanned the people in front of her; for once she was being praised for her talents and not taunted. She had even managed to turn the smug look on Santana's face in a genuine grin and Mercedes' jaw was practically on the ground. She grabbed her belongings and hurried from the choir room.

The choir room was silent for just a few seconds before everybody erupted into conversations. Talking over one another, they all wanted their points heard.

"We are a shoe in for regionals and sectionals if she's with us." Tina admitted, looking over at Mercedes.

"I can't wait to see the look on Vocal Adrenalines' theatrically drained faces," Artie smirked, pushing his glasses back up.

Mercedes raised a brow, "What does that even mean?"

"Is she like, secretly a Broadway star or something?" Finn asked. Of course he knew his cousin could sing, it was all his grandmother ever talked about. But...wow.

"I still can't believe she hit the high F," Kurt mused. She was even more amazing than he had imagined. And dare he think it, she could probably give him a few pointers.

"Move over Mercedes, we've got a new powerhouse voice to work with," Santana smirked.

Mercedes leaned forward and glared down the line of students to Santana Lopez, "excuse me?"

The Latina shrugged, arms crossed, "come on, you're all Aretha meets Jennifer Hudson and she's all Celine meets Barbra meets Idina Menzel…there are some songs that would just work better with her voice."

Kurt sat up straighter and looked over at Santana, "how do you even know who Idina Menzel is?"

Mercedes shook her head and hushed Kurt, "Listen Lopez, I know you're from Lima Heights Adjacent and all, but I'm not afraid and…"

"Ok, ok, ok," Mr. Schuester interrupted, "would you guys calm down? You know I've always been about splitting up solos and leads. And," he chuckled, still amazed and slightly caught off guard, "Rachel's voice was beyond amazing. And if she does join, yes, she'll probably get some solos and leads but that does not mean by taking them away from other glee members. That's not how we operate, and you all know that."

"From one diva to another, Mercedes," Kurt started, turning in his chair so he was facing his best friend, "we need Rachel. Yes, we're all amazing singers, but there's just that little piece of puzzle that's missing and I think Rachel has it."

"I'm not trying to be a bitch," Mercedes insisted, ignoring the scoff from Santana. "And Rachel seems cool and all, and yeah, that white girl sure has a voice on her but I will not be pushed aside by some transfer from New York City! I ain't going back to being Kelly Rowland!"

"And I assure you, you have nothing to worry about, Mercedes."

Everybody's attention turned to the brunette standing uncomfortable in the doorway. "Rachel," Mr. Schuester exclaimed, "did you change your mind?"

She shook her head, "of course not. I left my math book here and I was planning on starting next week's homework while I waited in the library for Kurt and Finn."

"Next week's homework?" Artie repeated, his jaw dropping slightly. "We're in the same AP class and I'm not even that far ahead."

"I like to stay on top."

Everybody's head turned to Puck (even Mr. Schuester's), waiting for a rude remark; but there wasn't any.

Still slouched back in his chair, Puck gave his fellow students a weird look, "what?"

"We're waiting for some kind of dirty comment," Mike whispered.

He rolled his eyes, "knock it off."

The slight distraction had given Rachel just enough of an opportunity to grab her textbook and sneak out of the choir room.


	6. Chapter 6

_AN: I'm on a roll. Reviews are highly welcomed. Thanks for those of you who are taking the time to review. I also just published a one-shot called Eleven. It's Rachel centric with a dab of Puckleberry. :)_

_Once again, I don't own anything. I apologize for the mistakes. _

Chapter Six

Rachel left her last class of the day and walked down the hall with a little hop in her step, now two weeks into the school year, she finally made it a whole day without getting slushied. She wasn't sure what had occurred for the jocks to change their minds, but the black eye Karofsky was sporting this morning certainly didn't go unnoticed by Rachel. She had her suspicions that a certain mohawked teen was behind the shiner and it had been confirmed at lunch when Tina explained Puck's absence was thanks to a lunch detention.

She was about to reach her free hand up to enter her combination when someone grabbed her elbow and pulled her away.

"Ow! What are you…" she looked up, "Santana!"

The Latina smirked, "desperate measures call for desperate times, Berry." She weaved the both of them through the crowd and pushed the girls' restroom door open with her back. As soon as they were in the restroom, she let go of Rachel's elbow.

Rachel huffed and crossed her arms, "I suppose you have an extremely good reason for man-handling me?"

"You're joining glee club," she said in a matter of fact tone.

"I don't know how many times I have to say this before someone actually listens to me but…"

"Oh blah, blah, blah." Santana rolled her eyes, "don't think I haven't caught you in the auditorium during lunch and after school, you just can't help but sing. It's like an automatic reflex or some shit, you were born to sing and you're just itching to join glee club."

"As true as that may be, I really just…" Rachel shook her head, why couldn't people just leave her alone? "You know what, forget it."

Santana's face softened, "no, go ahead and say what you need to say. It might help, you know."

"That's what Carole keeps suggesting." Rachel leaned against the sink and looked at Santana through the mirror, "she tried to suggest I go see a therapist or the school counselor. Apparently Mr. Schuester thinks it's a good idea, too."

"Well he's been trying to get in ginger's pants for the past three years, so of course he would suggest her," Santana reasoned. "But there's nothing wrong with finding somebody to talk to, and if it's a therapist, so be it." Santana shrugged, "if it helps, it helps."

"I really doubt it will," Rachel mumbled.

"What about singing? Does it help?"

Rachel was silent for a moment, "my mom had never missed one of my performances, no matter how far she had to drive or sometimes _fly. _My daddy on the other hand, hardly ever made it. My parents got into a fight the night before..."

"The night before what?"

She just continued, "My mom told daddy that he had better make it to my dance recital the next day. Rumor had it, people from Broadway and some of the best performing arts schools in the city would be there." She closed her eyes and allowed herself to drift back through her memory. "My mom called me right before I went on, they were running late, but they were both going to be there. She'd picked my daddy up from work to make sure he would come. They were so close, just a block away and then it happened…" Her knuckles whitened from the death grip she had on the counter as she relieved what the police officer on duty that night had told her.

Santana started to worry for the state of her friend, afraid that maybe her abrasive personality had finally pushed someone too far. "Let's just forget I asked, ok? You don't have to talk about it."

Rachel shook her head, "maybe if they hadn't been in a rush…I shouldn't have complained about daddy never coming to my recitals or my shows."

"It's not your fault," Santana whispered.

"Yes it is!" Rachel cried angrily, startling herself and Santana. She swung around and faced the other girl, "It's all my fault! I just wanted my daddy to come see me and be proud of me! Don't you see? If I hadn't acted like a spoiled little brat and absolutely insisted my daddy came to my recital then none of this would have happened! And now they're dead and you know what? I'm still acting like a spoiled little brat because all I want is for them to come back! I want them to come back and make them proud. Who is going to go to my shows? My mom….my mom…" Her whole body trembled and she gasped for air, her chest constricted and the pounding of her heart echoed through her head.

"Oh shit, Rach. You gotta breath!" She helped Rachel to the floor, "head down and breath. Deep breaths."

Rachel grasped onto Santana's arm and her nails unintentionally dug into the Cheerio's skin. She continued to gasp for air and her vision started to blur. "San…"

"I'm right here," Santana reassured. "Just try to breath!" Rachel's eyes rolled back and she fell limp in Santana's arms.

When Rachel woke up nearly an hour later, she winced at the huge pounding in her head. She tried to move her arm to rub her forehead but her action had tugged at something else. She opened her eyes and blinked a few times, adjusting her eyes to the dimly lit room.

"About freaking time."

"Santana!"

She frantically moved her eyes around until she found the source of voices. Her aunt, Puck, Santana and someone who she'd assumed to be a doctor (given he was wearing a white lab coat) were all crowded at the foot of her bed.

Carole rushed forward and brushed the damp hair from Rachel's eyes, "how are you feeling, sweetie?"

"What happened?" Rachel whispered.

"You passed out on me, Berry. That's what happened! Totally scared the shit out of me!"

"Santana, language," the doctor scolded.

Santana rolled her eyes, "Sorry, Papi."

Santana's father placed Rachel's chart back at the end of her bed and walked around to her side, "Rachel, I'm Dr. Lopez. You passed out at school, do you remember what happened?"

Rachel nodded, silently recalling the incident in the girls' restroom. "I couldn't breath."

Dr. Lopez nodded, "you had a panic attack and I've been informed that this isn't the first time you've experienced a panic attack."

When Rachel arrived home late that night after finally being discharged from the hospital (both her aunt and Dr. Lopez thought it would be a good idea for her to start seeing a counselor, so tomorrow after school, she'd be right back at the hospital), Carole had insisted following her all the way to her room to make sure she got there in one piece. She sat down on the edge of her bed, the mattress beneath her bouncing at the sudden weight.

"Do you need anything else, sweetie?" Carole sat Rachel's book bag on the floor by her door. "A glass of water, some ibuprofen? I can always make you a snack?"

Rachel shook her head and tried to reassure her aunt with a small smile, "if you don't mind, I think I'm just going to call it a night."

"Perfectly understandable." Carole hesitated, caught between wanting to give Rachel space and trying to get her to open up. "But if you need anything, and I mean _anything_, please don't hesitate to get me. I want you to know you can always come to me, ok?" The young girl nodded and Carole was satisfied enough to leave her alone.

She took a quick shower (there was just something about hospitals that made her have to shower the minute she got home) and changed into sweats and a loose t-shirt. She tried to tear off her medical bracelet but failed miserably (really, it was like they never wanted you to take them off) and her attention was soon fixated on the bruise forming in her arm from the I.V. they'd attached to her during her stay.

Her phone rang, startling her from her daze. She took it out of her purse and walked back over to her bed. She had 27 texts, 5 missed calls and 2 voicemails. By the time she'd been discharged from the hospital most of the glee kids had been forced to leave due to visiting hours ending. Not even Santana's father could allow the presence of eleven loud teenagers in the waiting room; patients were trying to sleep. Santana, Puck, Kurt and Finn had stayed while the rest had no choice but to leave. She'd promised she would see them all tomorrow morning at school.

She slid her phone open and opened her most recent text message, it was from Puck.

_Hope u got home safe._

She smiled and responded. _I did, thank you for your concern, Noah. I'm in bed now. _

It didn't even occur to her how an eighteen year old boy would take the text message.

_Ah come on, are you trying to kill me? _

Rachel's smile fell as she read the words and Puck must have immediately realized he'd worded his response wrong because he was now calling her.

"Hello, Noah."

"Those words totally came out wrong," he rushed to explain. "I just meant…shit, I meant that you sending me a text late at night and telling me that you're just chillin' in bed…"

Rachel blushed, "Noah!"

"I'm sorry," he mumbled, "I'm a dude and you're hot chick." There was silence and Puck mentally kicked himself, "Rachel?"

"Yeah?"

"That was a compliment."

"I know," she whispered. "It was a little crass but your point was made." She snuggled under her covers and pulled her gold star up to her chest.

"That's good, I think."

"It is."

Two hours had gone by since she'd ended her phone conversation with Puck, it was nearing midnight yet she was still as wide awake as ever. She rolled over suddenly as a thought occurred to her; the C.D. Puck had given to her. "_Just pop that in your C.D. player the next time you can't fall asleep."_ She'd burned the songs onto her iPod, but had yet to actually listen to them. She kicked her covers off and scrambled out of her bed and rummaged through her purse until she spotted the iPod touch. She settled back into bed and popped the ear buds in, the tracks were all untitled, so she had no idea what they were.

But she was Rachel Berry, and she firmly believed in expanding her knowledge in music so she was willing to take a chance on an untitled track. Her mother always told her one must have respect for all genres of music if one wanted to be taken seriously in music.

She gasped as the sounds of New York City filled her ears, removing one of her ear buds; she rolled to her side and put the first track on repeat. Somewhere around the fifth time of listening to the track, she dozed off with a small smile on her face.

She woke up earlier than usual the next morning when she rolled over and her face fell right into the iPod touch she had abandoned somewhere in the middle of the night. She smiled, remembering how it had gotten there and laid in her bed for a good forty five minutes, listening to the rest of the tracks.

When she entered McKinley High, Rachel was too busy looking for someone to pay attention to the whispers and stares. She wasn't at all surprised that her panic attack in the girls' bathroom was the hot topic of conversation. She spotted just the person she was looking for and quickened her pace.

Puck had been too occupied trying to find the cheat codes he'd written down for Call of Duty and stuffed at the bottom of his book bag to pay attention to the footfalls that were closing in on him.

"Noah Puckerman."

_Oh shit, his full name. _He slowly pulled his gaze away from his search and down to the short brunette in front of him. "Hey, Rachel." He paused, unable to read the expression across her face, "Sup?" He was completely taken off guard when she tackled him into a hug. He looked up to find more than a few raised eyebrows in their direction. He turned his attention back to Rachel and slipped one arm around her waist, "Uh, good morning to you, too."

"I'm sorry," Rachel pulled back quickly, realizing she had probably overstepped her boundaries. "Just wanted to say thank you."

"For what?" _Did she finally listen to it?_

"Last night, for the first time…" she trailed off and cleared her throat, "for the first time since everything happened, I was actually able to sleep and I have you to thank for that."

"What the hell Puckerman?" Finn had caught the end of Rachel's sentence as he was walking by with Quinn under his arm, "did you sleep with my cousin?"

More than just a few heads turned and Rachel could feel her cheeks burning. "Finn!"

"Come on Rach, you're my cousin. There's like some kind of bro code against a guy doing his best friend's cousin."

"He didn't _do _me as you so crudely put it!" Rachel whispered angrily.

"Oh," Finn smiled sheepishly. "I guess I overacted."

Quinn gave Puck and Rachel and apologetic smile, she grabbed Finn's arm, "we'll let you guys continue your conversation now." She pulled Finn down the hallway to meet up with some other members of glee club. Both Puck and Rachel could hear her practically telling Finn off.

There was still quite a few who were watching the two and Puck shook his head. He slammed his locker door shut and swung his bag over his shoulder. "Come on, this place is full of nosy people." He led her to the empty choir room and took a seat in an empty desk, "so what's up?" Rachel's cheeks were still a little red and he couldn't help but smirk.

Flustered, Rachel cleared her throat, "I listened to the C.D. you made me."

He sat up straighter, "oh yeah?"

She nodded, "I fell asleep with the first track on repeat."

"So you didn't make it to the rest?"

"Oh I did," Rachel clasped her hands in front of her, "and I absolutely loved the theme."

He shrugged, "no big deal. I figured what better way to be reminded of New York City than to have a C.D. full of songs about it. And you mentioned before that you listening to the sounds of the city helped you fall asleep."

She took a seat next to him, her knee briefly brushing his, "although, the eighth song…I couldn't really place it within the theme of New York City. I mean, yes, while Neil Diamond is a New Yorker and has always voiced his love for the city through his music, I just have to wonder, how did it fit in with rest of the music?" She'd broken eye contact with him and smoothed out the invisible creases on her skirt.

His voice held a mixture of defense and apprehension, "the song made me think of you." He felt as if he'd been caught doing something he knew he shouldn't be doing.

Rachel's head snapped up and her eyes bore into his, trying to read them, "Sweet Caroline made you think of me?"

Outside the choir room, several gleeks were leaning over each other and slightly shoving each other as they fought to get the best angle to spy on Puck and Rachel. Santana tried to push Artie out of the way but he put the brakes on and smirked at the groan she let out from running into the back of his wheelchair. Mike and Matt were both shoving one another out of each other's way. It wasn't often they saw Puck acting…nice.

Kurt winced, "Tina, that's my foot!"

"Oh shush," she waved him off, "I'm trying to listen."

"He wants to be her lobster," Brittany whispered. The gleeks all turned and looked at her, "what?" she asked innocently. "It was on an episode of Friends." She turned her attention back to Puck and Rachel, and soon everybody else followed suit.

"The tension is just ridiculous," Santana smirked. "Can't they just bang each other already and get it over with?"

"Ew," Finn muttered, "that's my cousin you're talking about."

Quinn shook her head, "there's just something different about the way he's looking at her. It's almost like he has feelings for her."

Artie nodded, "I bet they're together by homecoming."

Tina raised a brow and quickly put together the time-line in her head, "but that's only three and a half weeks away."

"Yeah, way too soon for Puckerman to make his move," Mike agreed.

"Oh please, it takes Puck less than five seconds to make his move," Santana argued, _she would know. _

"For lust, but this is like…for like," Sam tried to explain to his girlfriend.

Santana gave her a boyfriend a pointed look, "well we'll just have to see, won't we?"

"What are you saying?" Tina questioned nervously.

"We're gonna see how long it takes those two to get together."

"Now when you say get together, what exactly do you mean?" Artie questioned.

Finn held his hands up and shook his head, "totally not a part of this conversation anymore. I'll catch you guys later. Quinn?"

Quinn rolled her eyes, "ok, see you later guys. Santana, you better fill me in during first period." She looped her arm with Finn's and the two left for her locker.

Kurt pulled a small notebook out from his bag followed by a pen, "ok, so who says when?"

Tina didn't feel right about this, "we're really betting?"

Santana shook her head, "oh please, it's not like we're going to meddle or anything. It's just a fun little game to deal with the torture we're being put through because of Puckleberry's sexual tension."

"Puckleberry?" Matt asked.

"I'm still convinced it's more than sexual," Kurt mused, ignoring Matt's question. He wrote something down, "so Artie has homecoming, what about you, Satan?"

"Hey guys!" Mercedes came up behind them, "what's going on?"

Rachel and Puck looked up just as all the glee kids besides Mercedes started scrambling away from the door.


	7. Chapter 7

_**A/N: I own nothing.**_

Chapter Seven

"So Rachel, why don't you tell me a little about yourself?"

If someone else besides the psychiatrist sitting in front of her would have asked her that question a month ago, Rachel would not have hesitated in answering. She had put together several biographical essays in the past; one must always be prepared when asked about themselves. Not to mention the three sentences she had to write describing herself for a playbill of a small musical she was in last year, she wrote seventeen drafts before she was finally satisfied. But things had changed, and the last place Rachel cared to be was in a stuffy, cramped office talking about her feelings and why she was having panic attacks.

With her arms crossed, she answered, "I'm sure you've already been briefed on everything there is to know about me."

Dr. Kristof didn't waver, "I understand you experienced a recent tragedy. Do you want to talk about it?"

"I'm not crazy," she muttered. "And I don't need to sit and talk to a stranger about my parents' death in order to make myself feel better."

"I don't think you're crazy." Dr. Kristof uncrossed his leg and removed his glasses, "Rachel, your aunt is concerned about you. You've been experiencing panic attacks and you're not eating well. Have you noticed a change in your weight over the past month or so?" Rachel huffed and focused her attention on some framed award hanging behind Dr. Kristof. "Ok, so you don't want to talk about your parents, or tell me anything about you. Is there anything you do want to talk about?"

Still nothing. "Your aunt mentioned that you're a good singer."

Rachel tilted her head up, "I'm an excellent singer. I won my first singing competition when I was three years old."

Dr. Kristof smiled softly, now they were getting somewhere. "That's quite an accomplishment. Is that what you want to do as a career?"

"Lima is hardly the place to become an award winning singer and actress."

"I completely agree. Lima definitely isn't New York, but we do have some small community productions and different performing arts centers if you're interested."

"I'm really not interested."

"Do you plan on going back?"

She shrugged, "I did."

"What changed your mind?"

"I don't know if I can do it," the confession came surprisingly easy. Her eyes glazed over and she continued, "my mom was my biggest supporter. I don't know where I'm going anymore. She was my best friend, she was my only friend." She rubbed her chest, the familiar tightening creeping up, "sometimes I just wish…"

"You wish what?"

"I wish I had been in that car with them." Her chest heaved, "then we could all be a family again."

When Rachel walked out of Dr. Kristof's office nearly an hour later, her eyes were red and brimming with more tears threatening to fall. Carole smiled sympathetically at her niece, "are you ok, sweetie?"

Rachel nodded, "can I wait in the car?" She really didn't want to be around for the conversation that was about to take place between her aunt and Dr. Kristof.

Carole handed Rachel her keys and told her she'd be there shortly.

She'd been sitting in the car for nearly twenty minutes when Carole climbed into the driver's seat. She started the ignition and backed out of the parking spot, it was only when she went to put the car in drive did she notice the tears streaming down Rachel's cheeks. "Oh sweetie, you're not crazy."

When Carole had told Rachel that she wasn't just going to see a counselor but a psychiatrist, the teenager had absolutely freaked out.

"_No!" Rachel huffed, stomping her foot and crossing her arms. "I am not going to some doctor just so he can tell you I'm crazy and drug me with a ridiculous amount of medicine that'll probably do more harm than good!" _

"So what's going to happen?" she whispered, choosing to focus her gaze on the road in front of them.

"Well, Dr. Kristof has prescribed you some anti-anxiety medicine to help with your panic attacks. He wants you to come see him once a week, every Wednesday to be exact." She saw the look of horror wash over her niece's face and rushed to add, "he thinks your panic attacks are very much related to everything that you've been going through and he thinks it will help to talk to somebody. As your legal guardian, I completely agree."

The very next day, Rachel had been hiding out in the very last stall of the girls' bathroom for nearly twenty minutes during lunch before she was finally found. Being the overly observant person that she was, she noticed girls hardly ever used this restroom because of its close proximity to Mr. Figgins' office.

Finn just had to let it slip at the glee table that she had been prescribed anti-anxiety medicine and was scheduled to see Dr. Kristof at least once a week until the foreseeable future. Puck had been right when he'd said Finn had diarrhea of the mouth.

She'd been surprised by the owner of the voice who'd called her name and pulled the door open just enough to confirm who it was.

"Hey." Tina had her back up against the counter, "I figured you'd be here."

Rachel pulled the stall door back even farther, "how?"

"This was kinda my place to hide back in the day," Tina admitted. "I still come here on occasion, you know, when everything about high school becomes a little too much to handle." She smiled, "everybody else thought for sure you'd be in the auditorium, well, everybody besides Puck."

Rachel had noticed the attention Puck had been giving her, she wasn't blind. But she just wasn't quite sure what to do with it. "Really?"

She smirked, "so you do like him?"

"I didn't say that."

"Uh-huh." Tina took Rachel's hand and pulled her over to the sink next to her, "now let's get you cleaned up."

"I didn't get slushied, Tina."

"No but your eyes are swollen, you skin is blotchy and your make-up is running."

Rachel watched as Tina started digging through her make-up bag, "aren't you even going to ask?"

Tina looked up, "it's not my business, Rachel. But just so you know, you're not alone…"

"What do you mean?"

Tina sighed and pushed her hair behind her ear, "When I started middle school, something in me just kind of changed. I picked up stuttering, my grades started dropping and I started isolating myself of everybody and everything…" she shrugged and looked up at Rachel. "I was diagnosed with social anxiety disorder."

Rachel was startled by Tina's sudden confession, "I never would have noticed."

"With the help of some counseling and medication at one point, I became pretty good at handling it."

"And now?" Rachel urged.

"I still see my doctor every six months or whenever things become really stressful." She continued to shuffle through her belongs and handed Rachel a facial wipe to remove her make-up. "It's still hard sometimes, especially with the unknown. Or before big performances or a test, I really have to work on keeping myself together, but I honestly couldn't imagine my life without glee."

Rachel started wiping away the ruined make-up, "is that why you never sing lead?"

Tina shrugged, "my voice isn't a powerhouse that wins awards."

"Your voice is amazing, Tina. I've heard you sing in the auditorium a few times when you thought nobody was around." Rachel laughed at the look of surprise on Tina's face, "there's been a few times where I've gone up to use the auditorium and you've already been up there. Your voice definitely has an award winning sound to it."

"Tha..thank you," Tina stuttered, genuine surprise on her face, "That means a lot."

Rachel grinned, "I'd absolutely love to sing a duet with you one day."

Tina squealed and clapped her hands, "does this mean you're joining glee club?"

"I've decided to rethink my choice, but no decision has been made. But I want you to know, I really appreciate the confidence you have in my trust to tell me something so personal…I guess we're friends, right?" She looked down, slightly ashamed, "I'm not used to having friends."

Tina smiled at Rachel through the mirror and bumped shoulders with her, "well get used to it, girlie."

"Would you guys mind if I watched?" Rachel asked from the door of the choir room. She had told both Finn and Kurt to come find her in the library once glee practice was over, but despite her best attempts to stay away, she'd found herself standing outside the choir room.

Mr. Schuester turned to look at his students, silently asking for their thoughts. "Course not, Berry." Puck smirked, "some of these dweebs could use some pointers on performing."

Rachel shook her head, "I'm not here to critique, I would just like to watch."

"Well we're actually going to the auditorium…"

"That's an excellent idea, the acoustics there are so much better!"

Everybody shared looks with one another and Kurt spoke up, "we'd love the input of a true diva." Mercedes cleared her throat and jabbed Kurt in the ribs. "Ow! Mercedes! Just because I played football for two weeks, doesn't mean I have the abs like Mike Chang to prove it!" Kurt hissed.

At the mention of his name, Mike turned his attention from the game he was playing on his IPhone, to the people around him. "Did I hear my name?"

"Back off my man, Kurt," Brittany deadpanned. It was moments like this that people could never figure out how serious she was.

Kurt rolled his eyes, "relax, Britt. And Mercedes, what I meant to say, was we could really use an outsider's perspective on how our performances are looking." He shared a knowing smile with Tina who was sitting one level down from him. He gave her a reassuring nod.

"Uh…Mr. Schue!" Tina's hand shot up in the air. Mr. Schue was a little startled at Tina' willingness to be put on the spot, but he nodded for her to continue. "When we get to the auditorium, I'd like to perform a song."

They had all gathered into the auditorium, everybody took a seat in one of the first few rows right in front of the stage. Tina walked nervously onto the center of the stage, dragging a stool with her. She never let her attention meet another's right before a performance but her eyes briefly met Artie's, Kurt's and finally Rachel's.

She slid onto the stool and gave Brad a quick nod, indicating she was ready. The music started, she took a shaky breath and raised the microphone up.

_You with the sad eyes  
>Don't be discouraged<br>Oh, I realize  
>It's hard to take courage<br>In a world full of people  
>You can lose sight of it all<br>And darkness still inside you  
>Make you feel so small<em>

The girls walked across the stage, two on each side of Tina, just in time to blend into the chorus.

_But I see your true colors  
>Shining through<br>I see your true colors  
>And that's why I love you<br>So don't be afraid to let them show  
>Your true colors,<br>True colors, are beautiful,  
>Like a rainbow.<em>

_(Ah ah ah...)_

_Show me a smile then,  
>Don't be unhappy,<br>Can't remember when I last saw you laughing  
>If this world makes you crazy<br>And you've taken all you can bear  
>You call me up<br>Because you know I'll be there  
>And I see your true colors<br>Shining through  
>I see your true colors<br>And that's why I love you  
>So don't be afraid to let them show<br>Your true colors,  
>True colors, are beautiful,<br>Like a rainbow_

_Ah ah ah ah..._

_Can't remember when I last saw you laughing_

_If this world makes you crazy  
>You've taken all you can bear<br>You call me up (Call me up! )  
>Because you know I'll be there (Know I'll be there)<em>

_And I'll see your true colors_  
><em>Shining through (I see them shining through! )<em>  
><em>I see your true colors<em>  
><em>And that's why I love you (That's why I love you! )<em>  
><em>So don't be afraid (Afraid) to let them show<em>  
><em>Your true colors, true colors<em>  
><em>I see your true colors shining through (Yeah! )<em>  
><em>I see your true colors<em>  
><em>And that's why I love you<em>  
><em>So don't be afraid (Afraid) to let them show<em>  
><em>Your true colors<em>  
><em>True colors, true colors<em>  
><em>True colors, are beautiful,<em>  
><em>Like a rainbow<em>

Quinn, Mercedes, Santana and Brittany tackled Tina in a hug. Artie whistled and clapped loudly for his girlfriend. Rachel hurriedly brushed the tears away and jumped up from her seat to clap loudly for Tina.

Puck followed Rachel's cue and stood from his seat, he hopped over the row of seats so he was next to her. He smirked when he caught her gaze watching his form as he did so, "like what you see?"

She blushed and tried to hide her grin, "don't flatter yourself."

"Nah baby, I'm trying to flatter you." He grinned down at her, "so how long until you finally agree to join glee?"

"When you guys finally wear me down and I give in."

"Really?"

Rachel rolled her eyes, "no. It' a lot to think about. Do you know how much time it takes to put into a winning glee club? I don't know if I have that kind of energy, Noah." She sighed and looked down at her feet, "sometimes I barely have enough energy to get myself out of bed in the morning."

Puck shoved his hands in his pocket, he wasn't going to bring up Rachel's therapy sessions. "You know, it's nothing to be like…ashamed about or something." Rachel looked up at Puck, "it makes you human."

"He kind of reminds me of Santa Claus," Rachel said after a bit.

"Who?"

"My psychiatrist." Puck laughed and Rachel glared at him, "it's not funny! I'm Jewish, Noah!"

Puck nodded and took a breath, "speaking of that…"

"Hey yo love-birds!" Santana yelled from the stage, "we've got a practice to start!"

Brittany appeared next to Santana, "I still prefer lobsters."

Rachel could feel the considerable warmth of her cheeks and slouched down into her seat. Puck smirked and hopped back over the row of seats, "catch ya later, Rach."

The rest of glee practice went by without a hitch. They had started the process of picking songs for sectionals that were coming up at the end of October. Rachel had sat silently in the middle of the auditorium, taking in the performances and the methods in which the glee club went about practicing. Once or twice she really had to keep herself from inputting advice from her experiences with a national award winning glee club.

First of all, while Don't Stop Believing was an excellent song choice, she just didn't think Mercedes was right for the lead. And while back in New York, she wouldn't have thought twice about speaking her mind, it was clear that Mercedes was a little worried about Rachel's presence so she'd decided to keep her comments to herself.

The choreography that Mike and Brittany had put together was amazing, she'd never seen such rhythm and flow in choreography for a glee club. It was sure to be a plus if they made it to New York for nationals. _New York. _

Rachel closed her eyes and leaned into the back of the chair, she just wanted to go back. But no matter what she wanted, she wasn't going to get.

"Yo Berry!" Santana announced from the stage, "we're going to Breadstix and you're coming with! I will not have you comparing this place to Olive Garden or the Spaghetti Warehouse!"

The glee club, minus Matt, Mercedes, and Sam had all settled around several tables that had been pushed together to accommodate their large group. Rachel found herself seated between Puck and Santana, with Tina and Kurt both in her line of vision directly across for her.

Rachel reached for one of the menus that the waitress had sat down and was startled when Santana pushed her hand away, "no need, Berry."

"But I…"

Quinn shook her head, amusement in her voice, "don't argue with Santana when it comes to Breadstix."

Brittany nodded, "she once got a manger fired because they stopped serving us breadsticks."

Mike nodded, "and she once brought a wheelbarrow and insisted they fill it to the top with breadsticks."

"The salad bowls here are bottomless," Tina pointed out. Her eyes got wide with excitement, "they have to keep filling the bowl up until you say you're done."

Puck nodded, his leg brushed up against Rachel's and he smiled at the slight jump, "this place is legit the best ever. Nothing is better than two dollar Tuesdays. All you can eat pasta for two bucks!"

Kurt rolled his eyes, "but the amount of carbs they serve are absolutely horrifying."

Later that evening, after returning home from Breadstix, Rachel had left Quinn, Finn, Blaine and Kurt downstairs in the living room. Being the fifth wheel was a little uncomfortable. "I know it's around here somewhere," Rachel said aloud to herself as she continued to search through the boxes of things she'd stored in the back of her closet.

"Hey Rach?"

"Yes?"

Quinn peeked her head into the closet, "is there a reason you're talking to yourself?"

"Didn't you hear? I'm totally crazy." Rachel ignored the apologetic look that passed over Quinn's face, "found it!"

"Found what?"

Rachel held up a thick notebook, "my glee notebook!"

Quinn raised a brow, "is someone finally joining glee?"

Rachel shrugged, brushed past Quinn and plopped down on her bed. "If I'm going to consider it, then I've got to consider all aspects. The practice and the preparation is just a small portion of the effort it takes to become a winning glee club."

The blonde sat down next to Rachel, trying to keep up with what she was hearing, "are you saying we're bad?"

"I'm…" Rachel pursed her lips, "I'm not saying you're bad…I'm just saying, you guys have potential to be so much better. And don't get me wrong," she rushed, "I'm not knocking Mr. Schue's ability to successfully lead you guys to a state or even national title…"

Quinn laughed, "Rach, calm down. I know there are days that we suck, we're a very inconsistent group of people. Individually, we all excel, but when you try to mesh us together, sometimes we clash." She frowned, "some more than others." She opened the think book that doubled as a scrapbook and a records book.

"Who's that?" Quinn pointed to the picture of a guy who had his arms wrapped around Rachel and laughing.

Rachel ripped the picture from the book, ignoring the tug of the glue that tried to keep it in place. "That's Jesse St. James, but he's not important."

"Ex-boyfriend?" Quinn questioned, her gaze softening when she looked back up at Rachel and noticed the girl's inner struggle to contain her emotions.

"Very much so." She slipped the remains of the picture to the back of the book, "anyways…"

Two days later, at the next glee practice, Rachel walked in and announced she was accepting their invitation to join. She was met with loud clapping, cheers and even a few hugs. Kurt had grabbed her hand and insisted she sit next to them. Nobody caught the look of disgust on Mercedes' face.

They had all started to settle down when Rachel raised her hand, "If I may, I'd like to ask something?"

Mr. Schue nodded, "go ahead."

"What's with your obsession of Journey songs?"

Everybody stifled laughs, and Mr. Schue rolled his eyes. "Seriously, are we going to have this conversation again?"

Mercedes crossed her arms, "so are you saying we shouldn't do Don't Stop Believing?"

"No, of course not. It's a wonderful opening number. But winning glee clubs have this extra element to them that you know is there but you can't quite touch on what it actually is. Everybody in here has an amazing talent but I just feel like you guys aren't working well with one another. It's the same old songs and same old leads…"

"I knew it! You want lead!" Mercedes exclaimed. "And it ain't happening. We've already got our songs prepared for sectionals. Finn and I are singing lead on Don't Stop Believing."

Santana rolled her eyes from her seat directly behind Mercedes, "we need three songs, Aretha, not one."

Rachel raised her hand, "I have a suggestion…"

Kurt nudged Rachel, "you don't need to raise your hand."

"Oh, right." Rachel put her hand down, "anyways, I really think We are Golden by Mika is a wonderful anthem song. It's got feeling, spunk, and the ability to be split up and give different verses to different people. I'm also quite confident that Mike and Brittany could arrange an amazing routine to go with the vocal performance."

Mr. Schue nodded, "I've never heard of the song but I'll definitely take it into consideration. We still need one more song, though. We've got our duet, a possible group number, but we still need our solo." He wrote the four letter word in big print on the wipe board behind him and drew a line below it. He turned back to his students, "Any suggestions?"

"Well considering I can belt out notes better than any of you, I think I should take the solo," Mercedes said confidently.

Rachel could feel her inner-diva on the verge of making an appearance. "With all due respect, Mercedes, I think everybody should get an opportunity to sing the solo." She cleared her throat and sat up a bit straighter, "I know a few others in here would like the chance, including me."

_**A/N: thanks guys for reviewing, it really means a lot! So what do you say? At least ten reviews? ;) This chapter was a set up for several things...including maybe some Puckleberry...wink wink.**_


	8. Chapter 8

Here's the next chapter, sorry it took so long. I've got just two and a half weeks left until I graduate college..so obviously it's been taking up most of my time. Thanks for all the lovely reviews, please keep them up! They mean awesomeness to me. :)

Chapter Eight

"You what?" Mercedes countered.

Rachel's smile faltered a bit but she stood her ground, "I said I would like to audition for the solo. Not today, of course. I'd like some time to prepare a piece and…"

Mercedes shook her head, "oh hell to the no!" She turned to anybody, looking for support; Tina's head was down, Kurt was suddenly interested by a button on his shirt and Matt was avoiding eye contact. "Mr. Schue?" She looked over at the only adult in the room, "I thought we already decided that I was going to get the solo? I am the best singer in this club, it's only right if we want to actually have a shot at winning nationals this year!"

"With all due respect, Mercedes, you guys didn't even make it to Nationals last year and am I correct in assuming you sang the solo?" There were a few gasps and a small snicker that came from someone sitting behind Rachel and it sounded a lot like Santana. She tried to hide her own smile.

"Just because you're some little Broadway diva from New York City doesn't mean you know what you're talking about."

But Rachel carried on. She squared her shoulders and sat up straighter. "Quite the contrary, Mercedes, last year's glee club that won nationals, that was my glee club. And while it was quite a large club, I did manage a few leads and even a solo or two…" she put her hand up to stop Mercedes, "just stop and let me finish, ok?" She took a breath and looked around at everybody, "I feel I need to be completely honest with you all. While I love singing and want to help you guys win Nationals, I have a slightly ulterior motive for finally joining glee club…"

"It's because you want to go back to New York," Santana waved of Rachel's would be confession, "yeah, yeah, we all kind of figured. But you're good, Berry. You like to sing and you want to win. You wanna go to New York and we wanna win Nationals." She shrugged, "total win-win."

Brittany nodded, "we'll help each other out!"

Quinn smiled and leaned forward to squeeze Rachel's shoulder, "that's what friends are for."

Rachel's heart swelled. _Friends. _

"You can totally be our tour guide when we get to New York!" Mike chimed in, obviously trying to lighten the mood.

"Well I doubt we'll have time for much sight-seeing, going to Nationals is a very serious and honorable recognition that should be taken very seriously. There are fifteen groups that make it, and it's a three day event. We'll need several set lists prepared just in case someone gets sick or something else unfortunate happens and…"

Tina's mouth fell and she looked over at Artie, "Did we just create a monster?"

"That or we awoke the monster," Artie replied.

Mr. Schue laughed and put his hands up in surrender, "ok, ok, Rachel, I'm happy for your enthusiasm, but we haven't even made it through sectionals yet. Let's take it one step at a time, ok?" Rachel nodded, her shoulders falling in minor embarrassment. Mr. Schue went back to the wipe board and wrote out solos, and underneath writing both Rachel and Mercedes' names. He turned back to his students, "anybody else want to try out for the solo?"

Everybody's eyes shifted around the room and shyly, another hand went up. Mr. Schue raised a brow in surprise, "Tina?"

Tina shrugged, "I'd li..like to give it a shot." She couldn't bring herself to look over at her best friend, the guilt coursed through her and cemented in the pit of her stomach. Maybe it was time to step out of her best friend's shadow. That was allowed, right?

"Ok." Mr. Schue added Tina's name, "anybody else?"

"Oh heck, why not?" Kurt's hand shot up in the air, "let's make the competition a bit more interesting, shall we?" He bumped his shoulder with Rachel's and shared a small smile with her.

Mr. Schue called it a day not too long after that, he'd instructed the four who wanted to try out for the solo to be prepared to perform at their next practice.

Rachel took her time in gathering her belongings until it was just her, Mercedes and Mr. Schue left in the choir room. Mercedes had tried to reason with the Spanish teacher but he was having no change of heart in the solo tryouts. When he left, Rachel took a breath.

"Mercedes," Rachel approached the diva with her shoulders squared and head held in confidence. She took the steady glare she was receiving from Mercedes as a sign to continue, "I just want you to know I'm really not trying to take anything away from you. So may the best vocalist win?" She held her hand out in a truce.

Mercedes' eyes narrowed on Rachel's extended hand before she drew them up to the brunette's own eyes, "you can shake my hand in congratulations when I win the solo." She grabbed her things and brushed past the startled brunette.

Kurt was leaning up against the lockers right outside the door, close enough that he could hear what was being said but far enough that neither one of the girls noticed him. When Mercedes stormed out of the choir room, Kurt pushed himself off the lockers, "Mercedes! Wait!" He should have known she wouldn't. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Rachel leaving the choir room. With her books huddled to her chest, she gave him a thin smile and nodded her head. Kurt's shoulders fell with relief, "You sure?"

Rachel nodded, "yeah. She's your best friend, go talk to her."

Kurt tossed her the keys to his navigator, "I'll meet you out there in a few minutes."

"No rush."

* * *

><p>Mercedes was the first to audition, she was slightly more nervous than she had anticipated. She adjusted the height of the microphone stand to properly suit her.<p>

Her choice of song was pretty much expected; another "I'm a diva and I demand your respect" song.

Kurt was second to audition, she sashayed onto the stage, microphone already in hand. He winked at Tina and Rachel who were standing on the other side of the curtain, waiting for their turn to audition.

He took the microphone from the stand, "Hit it, Brad."

_I wanna talk to you  
>{The last time we talked Mr. Smith you reduced me to tears<br>I promise you that won't happen again}_

_Do I attract you?_  
><em>Do I repulse you with my queasy smile?<em>  
><em>Am I too dirty? Am I too flirty?<em>  
><em>Do I like what you like?<em>

_Yeah, I could be wholesome_  
><em>I could be loathsome<em>  
><em>I guess I'm a little bit shy<em>  
><em>Why don't you like me?<em>  
><em>Why don't you like me without making me try?<em>

_I try to be like Grace Kelly_  
><em>But all her looks were too sad<em>  
><em>So I tried a little Freddie<em>  
><em>I've gone identity mad!<em>

_I could be brown, I could be blue_  
><em>I could be violet sky<em>  
><em>I could be hurtful, I could be purple<em>  
><em>I could be anything you like<em>

_Gotta be green, gotta be mean_  
><em>Gotta be everything more<em>  
><em>Why don't you like me?<em>  
><em>Why don't you like me?<em>  
><em>Why don't you walk out the door...<em>

Tina was next, she took a deep breath as she approached the microphone nodded at Braid when she was ready…

_Grew up in a small town  
>And when the rain would fall down<br>I'd just stare out my window  
>Dreaming of what could be<br>And if I'd end up happy  
>I would pray (I would pray)<em>

_Trying hard to reach out_  
><em>But when I tried to speak out<em>  
><em>Felt like no one could hear me<em>  
><em>Wanted to belong here<em>  
><em>But something felt so wrong here<em>  
><em>So I prayed I could break away<em>

_I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly_  
><em>I'll do what it takes til' I touch the sky<em>  
><em>And I'll make a wish<em>  
><em>Take a chance<em>  
><em>Make a change<em>  
><em>And breakaway<em>  
><em>Out of the darkness and into the sun<em>  
><em>But I won't forget all the ones that I love<em>  
><em>I'll take a risk<em>  
><em>Take a chance<em>  
><em>Make a change<em>  
><em>And breakaway<em>

Rachel smoothed out the back of her plaid skirt and slid elegantly onto the bench in front of the piano, slightly aware that Brad had been miffed when she told him she would be playing the piano for her own audition. The excitement in her fingertips transferred to the keys of the piano as the music started to fill the auditorium.

She took a breath…

_There's a fire starting in my heart  
>Reaching a fever pitch, and it's bringing me out the dark<br>Finally I can see you crystal clear  
>Go ahead and sell me out and I'll lay your ship bare<br>See how I'll leave with every piece of you  
>Don't underestimate the things that I will do…<em>

Two days later, during their next Glee meeting, Mr. Schue strode confidently into the choir room. He was oblivious to the tension as he clapped his hands to gain his students' attention so he could announce his decision.

"I've thought a lot about this…."

Santana rolled her eyes, arms crossed, "well spit it out already."

"I don't think we should have a solo…" He didn't even get to finish his sentence before the protests came.

"What the hell, Mr. Schue?"

"We _need _to have a solo in our set list!"

"Hey!" Mr. Schue exclaimed, his hands up in defense as she regained everybody's attention. "Would you please let me finish? I've scrapped _Don't Stop Believing_ and took a listen to _We Are Golden_, and if we can perform it correctly I think we should go for it. But then I'd like to have a duet and another number that splits up leads and gives four individuals solos." He made eye contact with each of the four students who had auditioned for the solo, "I would like Tina, Kurt, Rachel and Mercedes to perform the last song together."

"No," Mercedes shook her head and crossed her arms, "I am not playing second fiddle or whatever just because you're too afraid to make a few of your students mad. I'm not doing another group number, hell no."

Puck rolled his eyes, "geez, cut the attitude, will you?" Without really thinking, he laid his arm over the back of Rachel's chair, "my girl Berry here kicked your ass in the audition, you should be thankful that Mr. Schue doesn't have the balls to choose who should do the solo. It's the only way you're getting a part in the song."

Rachel stiffened under Puck's arm but didn't pull away, either. Her ears were ringing with what he'd just said, _My girl Berry._ She could feel several pairs of eyes on her and focused her gaze on her feet.

"You know, we had a good vibe going on before Rachel joined Glee," Mercedes started, scrutinizing the New York native who was several seats away from her. "Now look at us, we're arguing and fighting over solos. So much for team unity that you're constantly trying to get us to work on, Schue."

"That's it!" Kurt bellowed, causing more than a few people to jump. He turned to the girl who he'd considered his best friend since the first day of high school. "If you can't face a little competition now, then how are you going to face it in the real world? This is glee club, Mercedes, the one place in this school where we should all be able to feel comfortable to be ourselves and here you are making it hell for Rachel. You think winning a solo is the most important thing to her? No. But does she deserve it? Yes. Should she get it? Yes. So either accept Mr. Schuester's decision or get out because frankly, I'm tired of it."

Kurt finished and the room was left in complete silence. Kurt and Mercedes arguing was like Santana and Brittany arguing. It was just something that didn't happen.

"I see." Mercedes huffed and grabbed her bag and purse that she'd pushed underneath her seat, she stood up and looked directly at Rachel, "congrats, not only did you get my solo, but you got my best friend, too." She turned to Mr. Schue, "I quit."

Another glee meeting had been called to an abrupt end.

"Well at least we still have enough members to be able to perform at sectionals," Artie broke the silence after Mr. Schuester had left the choir room.

Rachel's head snapped in Artie's direction, "How can you not be upset about this? How can you not be upset at me?"

Finn rolled his eyes, "Mercedes is always acting like that. She's just mad, it's not your fault."

"She just told me I took her best friend away from her!" Rachel countered. "Clearly I overstepped my boundaries and the last thing I wanted to do was disrupt the welcoming and united chemistry everybody in glee club had before I joined."

"Please," Santana scoffed. "You think we always get along? Just because we've always got each other's backs doesn't mean we always get along. Take thing 1 and thing 2 over there," she pointed to Matt and Mike, "I'm convinced they have this super weird friendship that revolves around the constant argument of what's better, a pirate or a ninja but hello, they're great dancers and loyal peeps." She pointed to Tina, "and before you came around, I hardly ever heard Gothy Ms. Goth say more than five words. Like I honestly didn't even know she could sing."

Tina looked a little bit offended but didn't say anything, she smiled when Artie slipped his hand into hers.

"Sooo…" Rachel started, her face scrunched in thought, "what you're saying is that even though you're all in the same club and have each other's backs, you guys hardly know each other?"

"That's not true, I know everybody in here." Brittany pointed to Rachel, "you're Rachel, that's Puck, that's Finn…"

Santana lowered Brittany's hand, "she means knowing about all of us. Like what we like and shit like that."

"Oh." Brittany frowned. "I know that Santana's favorite candy is skittles or maybe that's her favorite drink? I'm confused."

Puck grunted and stretched his arms, "well as much as I'd love to continue this bonding crap, I got shit to do."

Sam sat up and grinned, "C.O.D?"

"Totally." He stood up and grabbed his bag, "I'll be on around five."

"Well maybe we should have a party?" Rachel quickly suggested when everybody started to leave. She'd successfully grabbed their attention. "I'm sure if I ask my aunt she'd let me have a little get-together."

Finn shook his head, "no, ever since Kurt and I had that crazy party while my mom and Burt were on their honeymoon…our house has been banned from ever throwing another party."

Kurt nodded sadly as he reminisced, "it's true. Words cannot describe how amazing that party was…even if the police were called."

"Noah?" Rachel asked hopefully, turning her big brown eyes up at him.

Puck groaned, "Berry don't look at me like that. I can't, my ma would kill me."

"If we're serious about this," Santana chimed in, "then I'll volunteer my house. The parents are out of town the weekend of homecoming and my siblings are thankfully being sent to my aunt's house in Dayton."

Kurt squealed, "I can't believe I almost forgot about homecoming! It's seriously two weeks away and I haven't even started putting together what I'm wearing!" He clapped his hands enthusiastically, "girls, any of you have any place you have to be right now?"

Artie nudged Puck with the front wheel of his wheelchair. "Ow!" Puck cursed and glared down at Artie, "what the fuck, dude?"

Artie rolled his eyes and nodded his head towards Rachel just as she spoke up, "You go ahead, I don't really plan on attending homecoming." Ok, so he knew they weren't supposed to interfere but he'd seen the longing looks Puck had been shooting Rachel almost since the minute she moved to Lima.

"No way, Sweetie," Quinn shook her head, "we still have two weeks left, more than enough time to find you a date." She shot a quick and discreet glance in Puck's direction, smirking at the look on his face. "So we're going to find you a dress that'll make every guy's jaw drop the minute you walk into that auditorium."

"Dude," Artie mumbled, staring pointedly at Puck, "grow some balls and ask her."

"Dude," Puck bit back, "mind your own business."


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

"Hey Berry!"

Rachel spun around at the sound of her last name (she had yet to figure out Puck's motives for his different names for her…Rach, Rachel, Berry, Midget, Babe, the list went on and on). She'd been headed to her locker to get what she needed before leaving school. She smiled and moved out of the middle of the hallway, out of the way of her fellow classmates and waited for Puck to meet up with her.

"Hello, Noah."

He gave a half nod, "so where's your crew?" She raised a brow in confusion and he rolled his eyes, "come on, I know you've noticed it, too. You've usually got like at least someone from glee following you around like a lost puppy."

It was true, especially since she'd joined glee last week, Rachel had developed a bit of a following from some of the other members of the club, well, except for Mercedes but that was kind of obvious. Both Santana and Tina had developed really good friendships with Rachel. And Puck couldn't even begin to count all the times Finn would call him up and ask him to get on x-box live because Quinn had come over only to gravitate towards Rachel's room and spend hours talking, laughing, gossiping and whatever else it was that girls did.

Rachel shrugged, "they all have plans, I suppose." She headed towards her locker, a little surprised to see Puck meeting her stride. She cast a suspicious glance at him out of the corner of her eye, "don't you have detention or something?"

"Nah," he leaned up against the locker that was next to hers and shoved his hands in his pockets. "Coach Tanaka had some family emergency." He groaned, "but he's making me come in early tomorrow for some extra practice as punishment. At five in the fucking morning."

"Language, Noah."

"Yes, mom." She rolled her eyes and struggled to pull her history book out of the bottomless pile of books and notebooks that were stacked in her locker. "Geez, woman, you've got like a f-" she sent him a look, "freaking library in here!" He pulled the last book out with ease, took her book bag from her and slipped the book in. "Anything else?" Rachel shook her head. "Good." He slammed her locker shut, hoisted the purple jansport over his free shoulder and started walking.

"Um, Noah?" Rachel asked. He grunted, letting her know he was listening, "can I have my book bag back now, please?"

"Nah, babe. I got it."

"Oh ok, thank you."

"Don't mention it."

The hallway had emptied out quickly during the few minutes they were at Rachel's locker. Besides the students that stayed around for extra-curricular activities, nobody ever lingered in the hallway after the final bell of the day rang.

They walked silently side by side, neither knowing exactly what to say. Rachel for once found herself speechless, unable to read Puck's actions. Puck on the other, didn't exactly have a plan of action, he was just kind of winging it.

When they made it out to the student parking lot, Rachel groaned, "Oh that's just great!"

Puck raised a brow, "What?"

Rachel huffed and sat down on the steps, "Kurt went to the mall with Mercedes, something about trying to get Mercedes to cut the attitude." Puck scoffed and Rachel thought for sure she heard him mutter something along the lines of _good luck with that._ She tried to give him a disapproving look but a small, knowing smile had slipped instead. "So anyways, Finn was supposed to give me a ride home," she waved her arms out towards the nearly empty parking lot, "looks like he forgot. I'm not at all surprised, if I'm honest, though. I really can't expect people to continue to cater to all my needs."

"Bummer," Puck muttered, not at all believing it was a bummer. His eyes traveled down her bare legs as she stretched them out and crossed her ankles. It was way too chilly for her to be wearing a skirt, but he loved it.

She huffed, offended, "well don't sound so upset." She turned to look at him and followed his gaze, quickly pulled her legs up and curled them beneath her, "my eyes are up here, Noah."

He smirked; not at all upset he'd been caught. He met her eyes and he caught the fleeting look of uncertainty "come on, babe! You're short but you've got like the best legs ever!" She looked away as the pink crept into her cheeks, "I'll give you a ride home. You're like what, five minutes away from me?"

Rachel shrugged, "I don't know. If you recall, the only time I was at your house, I was little out of it to count the minutes from your house to mine."

Puck nodded, he really didn't want to push things with Rachel. She'd had her second therapy session yesterday after school, but she never spoke of them. Which was totally cool, Puck could tell it looked like everything was helping. But there were still those moments he would catch her in a silent battle with her emotions and trying to control them. Her focus would drift in large group conversations and sometimes when she sang in glee, he could see the tears in her eyes. She may have gotten pretty good at putting on a show, but she wasn't fooling him.

"You like, wanna talk about it or something?" the question slipped out before he had a chance to catch himself.

"Honestly, I'm tired of talking. I just want to be, well…be. You know?"

"Yeah, talking is kind of overrated." He stood up and held a hand out for her, "come on."

Rachel smiled and accepted his outreached hand, "this just might get you a batch of my famous sugar cookies, Noah." He grinned and gave her hand a squeeze. After a minute, she took a breath and spoke again, "does this go against your guidelines to being a badass? Giving a girl like me a ride home from school?"

"Baby, the thing about being a badass is there are _no _guidelines. A badass doesn't follow rules."

Somewhere during the short trip across the parking lot, her hand had settled into his quite comfortably. Neither knew what to think of it, but both were afraid to move their hands. When they arrived at his truck, their hands awkwardly pulled apart. He opened the passenger side door and helped her up the high step and into the seat.

It wasn't until he was walking around to the other side of his truck did he completely register all she'd said. _Giving a girl like me a ride home from school? _ His brow furrowed in sadness, the girl had self-confidence when it came to her singing, but when it came to who she was…it was kinda non-existent. Well he'd just have to change that. He jumped into the driver said and shut the door behind him. He started his truck up and turned to her, "oh and by the way, who wouldn't wanna give a girl like you a ride home?"

Rachel smiled but didn't say anything, instead she chose to focus her attention on the road in front of them. The drive had been silent; Puck drummed his fingers along the steering wheel to every song that came on the radio. When his truck rumbled to a stop in front of Rachel's house, he turned to her, "we're here."

"Yeah."

"Not ready to go in?"

She wasn't ready to go in; every afternoon after school had turned into the same old routine. Her aunt would ask her how her day was and try to keep a conversation with her while walking around her on eggshells. Rachel would get tired of it and excuse herself to her room to do her homework. Occasionally, if Carole was feeling hopeful, she'd ask Rachel if she wanted to help her with dinner. But Rachel would always kindly decline and insist that she had to finish her homework. Rachel shrugged and cut her eyes back to him, "why'd you call my name in the hallway? I'm sure you have a lot of other friends you could have spent the rare free afternoon off with…"

"Not really." He stretched his right arm out over the seat, his fingers lingering dangerously close to her, "Mike and Matt went to a dance workshop and Finn obviously ditched you for Quinn. Don't get me wrong, everybody else in glee is cool and stuff, but I don't really care to chill with them outside of practice and competitions. So yeah," he shrugged, "nobody really worth my time."

"Oh." Rachel looked down at her hands, so he was just spending the afternoon with her by default.

"You know, besides you." He added quickly when he saw the look on her face, "seriously, why do you think so little of yourself?"

Rachel shrugged and he thought it best to just let it slide for now.

"So you like football?" Rachel looked up at him curiously. "Cuz you know, we got a home game tomorrow. You should come, unless you'd rather spend your Friday night watching some lame ass musical." Rachel scoffed at the insult, her mouth hung slightly open and she crossed her arms. Puck laughed, "ah relax, I was just kidding!"

"I'm going to choose to ignore your comment towards musicals. Honestly, if people would just take the time to watch them, they'd see that they're quite wonderful. The way people can express emotions in musicals is just something that can't be done in some stupid action and comedy movie with blood and stupid automatic weapons! Not to mention the same old-"

"Rachel?"

"I mean, how many times can one plot be reused before it becomes useless? I'm pretty sure-"

"Rachel!"

Startled, her mouth fell shut. "I was rambling wasn't I? I'm sorry."

"Nah, it's cool. Talking seems to make you happy but don't get offended if I stop listening sometimes. So what do you say? Wanna come and cheer the Puckerone on?"

Rachel was nodding her head before she really got a chance to think about it. "Ok."

Puck perked up, "yeah?" Rachel nodded. "Cool!" He exclaimed. "But just don't get your hopes up, we kinda suck."

"I'm not too worried."

Puck cocked a brow, "Rachel Berry? Not worried about winning?" He poked his head out the window and looked up at the sky, "well I don't see pigs flying." He looked back down, "is this real? Do you have a fever?" He reached his hand out and put it to her forehead, he winked, "no hotter than usual."

Rachel blushed and tried to ignore the butterflies in her stomach from Noah's touch. She swatted his hand away, "stop," she mumbled shyly.

They sat in silence for a few more minutes and when Puck realized Rachel had no intentions of moving any time soon, he suggested going to get something to eat. She complied, as long it wasn't anything with dairy.

* * *

><p>Puck swallowed the mouthful of food and stretched his torso so he could pull his phone from his pocket. He flipped it open, "sup Hudson?" He smirked at Rachel, "yeah, she's right across from me. Why?" He shrugged, "I don't know. Let me ask." He pulled his phone away from his mouth, "you got your phone with you?"<p>

Rachel searched her purse before remembering she'd put it in the side pocket of her book bag, "no. It's in my book bag. Why?"

"Hudson's freaking out. Didn't remember he was your ride home until he got home and his mom asked where you were. They've been calling your phone for the past half hour." He turned his attention back to his best friend on the other line, "don't worry, dude. Tell your mom she'll be home soon." He rolled his eyes, "shut it." He hung up and sat his phone down.

"Oh my goodness! I forgot I was supposed to let Carole know if I wasn't coming straight home." She rubbed her eyes, "she has so many rules!"

Puck smirked, "you're telling me. I'm not even related to her and thanks to her friendship with my ma, your aunt is like James Bond or something."

"We should really get going." Rachel pulled her wallet from her purse but was stopped by Puck. "I'm paying for my half, Noah."

He shook his head, "totally on me." He winked, "as a thank you. Call it my thank you dinner for agreeing to go to my game." Rachel snorted, her eyes widened and she smacked her hand over her mouth in embarrassment. Puck busted out laughing, "real attractive, Berry."

Twenty minutes later, Puck's truck came to a stop right outside the Hummel-Hudson residence. Puck smirked, "you really gotta leave this time."

Rachel nodded, "I suppose I do, don't I?"

"See ya at school tomorrow."

Unfortunately for Rachel, her aunt was still rather upset about not calling and letting her know she wouldn't be coming home right away. What had started out as a one-sided lecture on the importance of informing Carole where she was or where she was going, had turned into a full blown argument. Rachel stormed out of the kitchen with her aunt right on her tail, catching the attention of all three men that were in the living room.

"I really wish you'd stop treating me like a baby!"

"This isn't about treating you like a baby, Rachel. When you didn't come home and I couldn't get a hold of you, I was worried. You're my responsibility and as your guardian I need to know where you're going to be if you don't plan on coming directly home after school."

The teenager crossed her arms and stomped her foot angrily, "are you sure that's the reason? Or is it because you're afraid I'm going to off myself or something?"

Kurt's eyes widened, Finn dropped the x-box controller from his hands and Burt nearly choked on his drink.

Carole sighed and tried to reach out for her niece, but the girl took another step back, "Rachel, sweetie, why don't we go someplace more private?"

"Why? It's not like you guys have any problems invading my privacy. Finn tells the whole entire glee club that I've been prescribed medication and Kurt just can't seem to think that I'm capable of putting together a decent outfit. And you have to know about my every little waking moment! I heard you and Dr. Kristof talking the other day after my appointment." She hurried past her aunt and rushed up the stairs. The four occupants in the living room flinched slightly at the sound of the door slamming shut.

* * *

><p>Thanks to Artie's ability to get great seats, come Friday night, Rachel, Kurt, Tina, Artie and Mercedes were huddled together, just feet behind the players. Rachel sat between Kurt and Tina and thankfully, her new cousin had yet to comment on the argument he had witnessed a few nights ago. They both thought about it when they were in the presence of one another, but neither voiced their thoughts. Rachel was of course upset and embarrassed by her harsh words; she'd never once thought about killing herself and she knew Dr. Kristoff was just doing his job by bringing up the very reasonable question. Kurt on the other hand, had dealt with death but never in the terms of suicide, when he was alone with Rachel, there were times the questions were on the tip of his tongue. But there was always something that stopped him, maybe it was the fear of knowing what the truth really was?<p>

So they both just ignored it.

After halftime, both teams came jogging back onto the field. The temperature had definitely dropped and Rachel was beginning to wish she'd brought a coat. But no, she didn't have anything that matched the gray and red colors of McKinley's football team.

"Hey Rach!"

Rachel looked up just in time to catch the oversized gray hoody. She caught Puck's wink before he threw his helmet on and jogged away to catch up with his team.

Tina bumped Rachel's shoulder with her own, gaining the brunette's attention, "well put it on before some jealous whore attacks you for holding Puck's hoody." She grinned with giddy, "Puck's a wanted man and you just snagged him up."

Artie threw out an imaginary fishing pool, "hook, line and sinker!"

Rachel shook her head but slipped the hoody on, her eyes briefly closed as she took in the scent. She was swimming in the article of clothing. She pushed the sleeves up so her hands were visible and turned to look at the four amused teens. "It's just a friendly gesture and nothing more," she defiantly said.

Mercedes rolled her eyes, she hadn't been happy when Kurt told her that Rachel would be attending the game with them but there was really nothing she could do about it. But really, did Rachel Berry have to take everything away from her? Everything she'd worked so hard for? She'd be damned if she let Rachel ever take a solo or lead away from her, _again._ "Don't be so dense, Puck wants you."

Kurt brushed off the harshness in his best friend's tone and nodded, "so FYI, we're going to accidently get separated from the crowd after the game and you'll have to get a ride from Puck."

Tina pulled her hair back in a messy bun, the aggressive Fall breeze was ridiculous. "We're all going to Santana's house for a party."

Rachel shook her head, choosing to ignore her friends' stupid little plan to have her end up alone with Puck. A part of her was kind of excited, even if the plan was a little bit juvenile in her opinion. "I must have gotten the weekends mixed up. I thought Santana's party was next weekend?"

Kurt nodded, "It is, but this is another party."

"Santana has a party every weekend." Tina explained.

* * *

><p>Rachel pulled away from Puck, breathless. "Did we just…did I just…" she shook her head and ran her hands through her dark tresses. "I didn't…you didn't…we just…" She brushed her fingers across her lips, "kiss?"<p>

Puck smirked and tucked a strand of hair that had worked its way out of her braid, behind her ear, "I really did leave you speechless."

"It was nice," she whispered. She closed her eyes and rested her forehead against his.

"Nice? Out of all the words in your huge vocabulary, you choose nice?"

"Don't ruin the moment." Puck's laughter shook both of their bodies and Rachel pulled back, "Moment officially ruined."

"Aw come on," Puck pulled Rachel back to him and slipped his arms around her waist. "Can't we make another moment?" He kissed her, "there's a moment." Kissed her again, "another one."

Rachel giggled against his lips, "ok, ok, point taken." She sighed happily and settled against him, "we should really get back to the party…"

"But…"

"But I like sitting in your lap," she whispered shyly. Puck smirked and started planting kisses along her jawline and down to her neck. His hands slipped up the hoody she was wearing and past the t-shirt she had on underneath, Rachel froze, "hands out, Noah."

He groaned but removed his hands, "but I'm just trying to make more moments."

"And that's perfectly acceptable. But please keep your hands above my hoody."

He cocked a brow, "Don't you mean _my _hoody? It looks good on you, but it'd look even better off of you…"

Rachel pushed herself out of Puck's lap and sat down next to him, "that line may work on a lot of other girls but it's not going to work on me." She angrily pulled the hoody over her head and threw it at him, she glared, "and yes, before you say anything crude, I'm fully aware that in some context, your line worked. But just so we're clear, I took the hoody off so you won't have to ask for it back."

"Rachel!" Puck sat up and watched helplessly as Rachel shoved her way through a few people and back into Santana's living room.

Rachel weaved her way through the party, looking for any familiar face. She found Quinn in the kitchen looking through the drink selection. "I really hope you haven't been drinking." She stopped right in front of the blonde and crossed her arms, "I need a ride home. Please?"

"A little demanding, but I'll bite. What happened?" When the lone tear fell, Quinn frowned, "you're starting to scare me. What happened?"

"Can you just take me home?"

Quinn nodded, "I can see if I can borrow Finn's car."

"Thank you."

Lucky for Quinn, she was used to being a designated driver and hadn't had a single drink at the party. She'd found Finn trying his best to play just dance but the guy was hopeless. He couldn't dance sober, let alone tipsy. She pulled his keys from his discarded letterman jacket and found Rachel sitting outside on the steps of the front porch.

"Ok, I got his keys, let's go."

They hadn't been driving for that long when Rachel furrowed her brow as they drove right by her street, "Quinn?"

"We're going to my house. I'm assuming you're mad at Puck and I guarantee the first place he'll go is your place." The brunette accepted Quinn's reason and let her head fall back, closing her eyes.

Back at Santana's house, Puck was searching every possible hiding place. Which happened to be a lot of places. "Hey!" Puck shoved Sam away from Santana, completely ignoring the glares they were sending him. "Have you guys seen Rachel?"

Sam rolled his eyes, "seriously, bro? You pull me away from Santana to ask me that?"

Santana waved off Sam, "calm down. We've got all night to get our mac on." She turned her attention back to Puck, "what the fuck did you, Puckerman?"

There really was no way Puck could explain himself without looking like an ass. Once he finished telling the two about the failed moves he'd put on Rachel and how she'd freaked out and rushed away from him.

"Damn," Sam whispered, "your moves didn't work?"

Santana lightly smacked her boyfriend upside the head, "really?"

"Oh come on!" Sam defended, "his moves are like, famous or something!"

"Whatever. Did you try calling her?" Santana grabbed her purse and pulled out her cell phone. Sure enough, she had a text, it was from Quinn. She read it and sent a quick reply before throwing her phone back in her purse. "She left and she doesn't want to talk to you." She raised a brow, "I'd suggest you leave her alone."

"Where the fuck did she go? Where the fuck could she have gone?"

* * *

><p>Quinn settled next to Rachel on the living room couch. Her parents were out of town for the weekend and her sister was back at Ohio State. "So you want to tell me what exactly happened?"<p>

Rachel pulled the blanket closer to her, "I was stupid."

"What happened?" Quinn repeated.

"One minute we were kissing and the next thing I know he's trying to put the moves on me! I told him to stop and he did but he got mad!" Rachel sobbed. "Why do guys all have to be the same? I'm not ready for sex yet and that's all it ever is to them!"

"Rach, boys think with only one thing and it's not their brain."

"But why? Jesse was the same way, I kept telling him no and he…" her words trailed off and she angrily wiped away the tears she'd tried her hardest not to let fall.

"Rach, sweetie, did Jesse ever do anything to you?"

Rachel shook her head, "no! But he broke up with me because I wouldn't have sex with him! And Noah, I've heard the rumors, Quinn! He's had all those older and more experienced women and I know he's had half of the cheerios squad! He's not going to stay with me if I tell him I'm not ready!"

Quinn smiled, "Rachel?"

The brunette fiercely wiped at her tears and hiccupped, "yeah?"

"Don't you think you should be talking to Noah about this?"

She hiccupped again, "Maybe. But I don't…I don't wanna talk to him right now."

"That's understandable. You hungry?"

Rachel nodded, "a little. The concession stand at the game lacked anything nutritious and not to mention it was way too expensive." Quinn laughed and rubbed Rachel's back, "can I have a glass of water? I drink water when I'm upset."

Quinn raised a brow, she'd observed the brunette's eating habits and had taken note of the weight loss. She was a cheerleader, she'd seen the true signs of an eating disorder and while Rachel did not have one, it worried her that Rachel wasn't eating in a routine or healthy manner. "As long as you eat something," she stood up and pulled Rachel with her. "Come on. I'm not very skilled in the kitchen but let's see what we can come up with."


	10. Chapter 10

_Sorry it took so long to get this update posted. I've been super busy with life, but 'tis the season, right? ;) This chapter kind of jumps all over the place but it's basically setting up to get storylines and plots moving along. Please review, please. :)_

Chapter Ten

Rachel had stayed the night at Quinn's and the two girls spent the day talking, bonding and Quinn had even convinced Rachel to let her paint her nails. Having friends was still a new situation for Rachel, yeah, she'd spent Saturdays with her mom getting pampered and bonding but doing those things with friends, _her _friends still became too much to process on occasion.

It was almost four in the afternoon on Saturday before Quinn dropped her off back at her place. Saturdays were always quiet at Hummel-Hudson residence so Rachel was perfectly content coming home to an empty house. She knew Burt usually spent Saturdays at his garage catching up on work, Carole would spend the day running errands and if she had time, she would get together with some coworkers. Rachel was supposed to have spent the night at Santana's because that's where all the girls were planning on staying, knowing Kurt, that's probably where he was. She'd also vaguely remembered hearing Puck mention something about crashing at Mike's so she's sure that's where Finn was.

First thing she did was a take a long shower, she was so deep in thought about last night's events she didn't even sing. Usually Finn would bang on the bathroom door and tell her the bathroom wasn't Broadway and that other people had to use it.

So the last thing she expected was to open the front door to find Puck on the other side and nervously shifting his feet.

"What are you doing here?"

"Can I come in?"

Rachel hesitated but eventually nodded, she moved aside just enough to let him cross the threshold into the living room and quickly shut the door behind them. If there was one thing she'd figured out since moving to Lima, the neighbors had to know everybody's business. The last thing she needed was Mrs. Winters, the old lady across the street telling her bingo partner, Mrs. Brenner, who lived three houses down that Rachel Berry spent an unsupervised Saturday afternoon alone with Noah Puckerman. Mrs. Brenner would tell anything to anybody who would listen to her; she was the gossiping queen at Temple and knowing the way she embellished stories; by the time it made its way through the grapevine the story would morph into Rachel being pregnant with Noah Puckerman's child.

She cleared her throat, looking anywhere but at Puck. "If you're looking for Finn, he's not here. Neither is Kurt, as a matter of fact."

Puck rolled his eyes, "I'm here to see you."

"Oh?" She fiddled nervously with the end of her t-shirt, "well this is certainly unexpected…" she was cut off by a container being shoved into her hands. She looked at it and then looked up at him, "What's this?"

"Brownies, they're probably not as good as your sugar cookies, you know they're not famous or anything but they always make my sister feel better." He shoved his hands in his pockets and shifted nervously as he watched her open the container. "It says, 'I'm sorry I made you cry. P.S. will you go to Homecoming with me?"

* * *

><p>"I'm so happy Noah finally asked you to join us for dinner, Rachel." Dana Puckerman gushed across the small table to their brunette guest.<p>

It had been three days since Puck had showed up at her doorstep with brownies and asked her to homecoming.

Rachel smiled and cast a knowing glance at Puck as he quickly busied himself with another helping of the casserole. "I'm very happy he asked me, too. We're all so busy with different things and prior commitments that it can be hard finding the right time to get together."

"Is Rachel your girlfriend?" Ellie asked with a mouthful of food.

Puck nearly choked on his food and Rachel smiled at the little girl, "Noah and I are taking things slow."

Ellie grinned, "but he brought you over for dinner and Noah never brings girls over." She looked over at her mom for verification, "right, Mom?"

Dana Puckerman smiled, "that's right." She caught the look her son was giving her and silently agreed she'd change the subject, "why don't you tell Rachel about the play you're doing at school?"

So the rest of dinner was spent with Ellie gladly accepting the center of attention, she told Rachel everything about the play that her fifth grade class was doing. They were doing Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs and she got to be the mean witch! "It's so fun playing a bad person because in real life you can't be mean!" She'd started to ask Rachel about the different plays she'd been in back in New York but her older brother had shushed her.

"No it's ok," Rachel smiled.

"Are you sure?" Puck checked. "Because Ellie can just mind her own business."

Rachel shook her head, "Noah, she's just asking about the different productions I've been in. There's nothing wrong with that." He accepted this but could see the apprehensive look in her eyes, underneath the table, he took her hand and intertwined their fingers. Rachel smiled and gave his hand a squeeze. She turned back to Ellie and started telling her about the different roles she'd had.

Puck stood with Rachel by the door, they were ready to leave, if only he could pull his sister and mom away from her long enough to get her out the front door.

Ellie wrapped her arms around Rachel's waist, "you _have _to promise to come back, ok?"

Rachel smiled, "I promise."

"Good." She released her grasp around Rachel and turned to her brother, "I told you the purple icing on the brownies would work!"

Puck joking shoved Ellie's shoulder, "yeah whatever, brat. Don't you have homework to finish or something?"

"Already finished," Dana answered. "But she does have a bath to take."

The three chuckled as Ellie dramatically made her way upstairs to take a bath.

Dana pulled Rachel into a hug, "just like Ellie said, don't be a stranger, ok?" Rachel nodded against Dana's embrace, "and I know you've got your aunt, but if you ever need anything, don't forget I'm always around."

"I won't," Rachel pulled back and took her purse from Puck. "I know I said it before, but dinner was wonderful and thank you for inviting me over."

Several hours after dropping Rachel back off at her home, Puck was awoken by the sound of his phone going off. He grunted and reached his hand out from beneath the covers and blindly felt around for his phone on the night stand next to him. He squinted at the blaring light on the screen but wasn't able to focus on who in hell could possibly be calling him at this hour.

"What?" Silence. He rolled over, rubbed his eyes and ran his hand over his head, "prank calling at this time of night, real mature."

"I'm…I'm sorry, I shouldn't have called."

"Rachel?" Puck pulled his phone away from his ear and double checked to see in fact it was Rachel who was on the other line.

"I'm sorry," she sobbed.

"No, no, you're fine. What's wrong, babe? Why are you crying?"

She sniffled, "I don't know." _That was a lie. _"Can you…" she sucked in a breath, trying her best to lower the sound of her sobs, afraid she'd wake up everybody else in the house. "Can you come over?"

She had been doing go so good. Keeping her emotions in check and not randomly bursting into tears at the most inconvenient moments.

Puck didn't hesitate. "Yeah, of course." He pushed the covers back and looked around for something to put on. "Give me ten minutes, I'll be there."

"Ok."

"And Rach?"

"Yeah?"

"Drink some water." He hung up and found a pair of basketball shorts and grabbed his gray McKinley hoody.

True to his word, Puck was jogging up the front lawn of the Hummel-Hudson residence in less than ten minutes; he'd parked his truck around the corner, not wanting to take the chance that somebody saw his truck parked out front. "Mother fucker," he cursed quietly as a possum darted out of the bushes and scurried away from him. Thankfully, Rachel's bedroom window was right above the porch. The railing gave him a nice boost and he scaled up to the window and knocked lightly on it. Through the glass, he could see Rachel uncurl herself from her bed and hurry to let him in.

Rachel moved back, giving him room to climb through the window, "I would have let you in the front door."

Puck shook his head, "nah, this is more badass." He shut the window, cutting off the cold air's path. When he turned back around he was startled to feel the tiny arms wrapping around him. Just as quickly as she had reigned in her emotions, she'd lost control over them. Puck's heart ached, and he led her back over to her bed. He kicked his shoes off and climbed into the bed next to her, "come here."

Rachel cuddled herself between his legs and Puck's arms instinctively wrapped around her. He found himself rocking her like he'd occasionally done in the past for his little sister when she was upset. Rachel wrapped her arms around his neck and held on for dear life, an action that for once, didn't sit well with Puck.

He kissed her forehead, "Rach?" Her body started to shake harder and he could feel her tears soaking through his hoody. "Rachel, you need to breathe," his tone was serious, almost like he was scolding her. When there was a hitch in her sobs, Puck pulled her away from his chest to look at her. Her brown eyes were wide and scared. He shook his head and wrapped her face in his hands, he kissed her and was relieved to feel the air she was exhaling against his own lips. "That's right, breath," he soothed.

Rachel's hands went atop of Puck's and she closed her eyes, concentrating on her breathing. After a while she lowered herself back into his embrace, the fabric of his hoody bunched up in her tiny fists.

"What happened?"

"I'm just sad," Rachel admitted.

"Nobody expects you to be happy all the time, Rachel."

She stayed quiet and then out of the blue she pulled back and looked up at him, "are you my boyfriend, Noah?"

"I uh…" He was, right? He did everything that boyfriends did, carried her books, held her hand, made out with her. "Yeah, yeah, you're my girl, Rach."

She smiled, knowing how hard it probably was for him to put his so-called badassness aside and say that, "I've only had one other boyfriend and my parents hated him." She traced her finger of the letters on his hoody, "I wish they were here…I want them to see that I did better. I want them to approve of you." She shook her head, "it's all so silly."

"Wanting your parents to approve of me isn't silly, babe. To be honest, I sometimes wonder if they would approve of me."

Rachel sniffed, "my mom always said she just wanted me to find someone who would treat me right."

"I treat you right, don't I?" He kissed her forehead and briefly made eye contact with her, "I know you were upset about what happened at Santana's but I want you to know that I would never, ever…"

"I know, I know. I was just being insecure."

"No need, babe. You're like the hottest chick in Lima."

* * *

><p>Puck dragged his feet through the parking lot the next morning, his eyes scanning over the students looking for Rachel. He'd parked right next to Finn's car and he'd caught sight of Kurt's Navigator, so he knew Rachel was at school. Now if she would just return his text messages.<p>

"Hudson!" Finn looked up from talking to Quinn and nodded his head in acknowledgement. "Where's Rachel?"

"Stayed home."

"She what?"

Finn shrugged, "said she didn't feel good."

Unlike her sometimes oblivious boyfriend, Quinn noticed the anger in Puck's voice and the slight panic in his eyes. "What happened?" Her eyes narrowed, "I talked to Rachel last night, she said dinner at your house went fine. So something must have happened late in the evening. What'd you do?"

"Nothing!" Puck promised. He adjusted his book bag, "she called me last night…or this morning, I guess. It was like two or something. She was sobbing and was in a full on panic attack. I went over…"

"Dude! You snuck into my house?" Finn asked.

Puck rolled his eyes, "not now." He turned back to Quinn, "so she was in like a full on panic attack, I came over and she spent the whole night just crying. I don't think either one of us got much sleep."

"Well did you try asking her what was wrong?"

"Of course! But she wouldn't talk. Just some mumblings and shit." He sighed and looked up, his eyes squinting in the light. He looked back down, "I can't skip, we have football practice tonight and coach won't let us go to practice if we didn't go to class. Some new lame ass rule he's decided to try, I think he's been around Mr. Schue too long."

Quinn shook her head, "it's fine, I'll take care of it." She said good-bye to both of the boys, promising to keep them updated and walked briskly into the school in search for the girls. She pulled her blackberry from her purse and activated the phone tree.

"Yo," Santana answered, "you want a coffee? I've been waiting in this ridiculously long line at the Lima Bean for like fifteen minutes now." She muttered something under her breath in Spanish.

"Forget the coffee, we've got an emergency."

Santana sent Brittany a text who she knew was working out in the gym with Tina (who knew those two had been taking dance together since they were thirteen?). Tina hit up Kurt and hesitated on notifying Mercedes. Kurt had settled her inner struggle and told her to forget about it. This was about helping Rachel, not making things worse for her.

* * *

><p>"I don't even want to know how you guys managed to get in here," Rachel pulled the covers up to her chin, "shouldn't you guys be in school, anyways?"<p>

"The same could be said for you," Santana sat down on the edge of Rachel's bed and eyed her friend carefully. "What's up with you, Berry?"

"Oh no, Rach!" Brittany picked up the picture that was front first on the night stand, "the picture of your parents fell down!"

"Britt," Santana whispered, but it was too late.

Brittany held the framed picture up, "you must have accidently knocked the picture down." She sat it up and turned it a little to the left towards Rachel's bed. "They can't watch over you if they're facing down." She rocked on her heels, proud of her good deed, "you look just like your mom."

Rachel wiped at her tears, "Thank you."

"Do hugs help?" Brittany asked. "Whenever I'm feeling sad, Lord Tubbington gives me a hug." She didn't wait for an answer, instead she hopped down on Rachel's bed and wrapped her arms around her.

Surprising herself, Rachel wrapped her arms around Brittany and cried harder.

"Group hug!"

Santana, Quinn, Kurt and Tina all piled on top of Rachel's bed and eventually the brunette's sobs turned into giggles. "Guys! I can't breathe!"

Slowly, everybody pulled away and took up different seats around Rachel's room. "I guess I should get ready for school, then."

Quinn raised a brow, "Rach, it's almost nine, we've all missed the first two classes of the day."

"Well, we'll just have to all go to the attendance office and get late passes…"

"Or we can skip?" Tina suggested.

Santana's eyes widened and she clapped, "our rebellious ways are starting to rub off on you, C.C."

Tina shrugged, now a little embarrassed at her suggestion. "I just figured, we're seniors, why not have an impromptu senior skip day?"

"First things first," Quinn tossed Rachel's phone to her, "text Puck and tell him you're alright. I thought for sure he was going to pass out with worry in the middle of the parking lot."

After sending Puck several texts and repeatedly insisting that she was fine, the girls settled around her bed. Things went great for the first few hours, but Rachel should have known one of her nosy neighbors would have noticed the extra car in the driveway (even though her friends had been smart enough to car pool over to her house).

* * *

><p>Rachel stepped out of the way so Puck could climb over the window sill, she crossed her arms and gave him a disapproving look, "you really need to stop making a habit of climbing through my bedroom window."<p>

"But, it's like my signature move, babe." He smirked and snaked his arms around her, both of them tumbled backwards onto her bed.

"You say that about everything you do."

"A guy like me has to have a lot of signature moves."

She raised a brow and tried to hide her amused smile. "Oh really?"

Still on top of her, he adjusted his weight so he wasn't crushing her, "yep."

"And what are these other signatures moves you speak of?" she asked shyly.

He kissed her and smirked against her lips, "you'll just have to wait and see."

Puck continued to shower her with kisses and Rachel managed to find her voice in between each kiss, "You shouldn't be here…I'm grounded." She pulled away suddenly, her eyes wide. "I'm grounded! I've never been grounded before!" She shook her head and covered her face with her hands, "I'm rebelling."

"Babe, you were upset and you skipped school once, it's not the end of the world." He chuckled, "and it's not like it's going to go on your permanent record."

"I'm glad you find this funny, Noah Puckerman."

"Nah babe, I just find it funny when you're flustered."


	11. Chapter 11

In a World Full of People

Chapter Eleven

Homecoming had been amazing as far as Rachel was concerned. She'd never been to a school organized dance, much less with an actual date. Puck had been a complete gentleman while still managing to keep his badass reputation in check. Rachel couldn't remember the last time she'd danced and laughed so much. At one point, Mike had tried to teach her and Tina how to do the dougie and unfortunately for Rachel, a handful of videos and pictures had been captured to prove it.

The whole gang had gone to Breadstix as one big group, and Rachel had felt oddly relaxed around all of them. Since moving to Lima, she'd slowly molded herself right into the glee club and their many friendships. She'd found herself settled between Puck and Tina with Quinn directly across from her.

Santana's party was a blast, and as promised, it had been a glee club only function. For the first time, Rachel really let herself get loose and relax around all of her friends, that was still weird, _friends. _They'd played Wii, a game she'd never in her life played and spent hour singing karaoke. Santana even suggested a game of spin the bottle but that didn't last too long when it was Sam's turn and the bottle landed on Quinn; Santana was not going to allow another episode of Fabrevans up in her casa.

Trouty mouth was hers.

Finn was just as happy to not see the kiss happen.

Little drama aside, though, Rachel had probably had one of the best nights of her life, all thanks to her boyfriend and friends.

Come Monday after homecoming, Rachel was still living in a bubble from her amazing weekend. It seemed as if her boyfriend had made it his mission to have little reminders pop up throughout the day that she was indeed dating Noah Puckerman. By second period, he had sent her so many texts, she had no choice but to turn her phone off. Come fourth period, when she'd excused herself to use the restroom, Puck came out of nowhere and swept her into the closest abandoned classroom.

"Hey Rach?"

She was currently in her second to last class of the day, her English class and while normally they would be in their usual classroom, they were in the computer lab and supposed to be working on their argumentative research papers. She looked away from the screen and to her left where Tina was facebooking.

"Yeah?"

"Do you have a facebook?" Tina asked. She smirked, slightly amused with her own question, "I just realized I've known you for nearly two months now and we're not facebook friends." She got slightly nervous when Rachel didn't respond, "I mean, it's cool if you don't want to be facebook friends, I was tagging everybody in my homecoming pictures and I thought…"

Rachel shook her head adamantly, "it's not like that, Tina. I assure you. It's just…" she sighed and lowered her eyes, "I haven't been on my facebook since before my parents…"

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said anything!"

"It's fine." Rachel typed the site into her browser and followed with her email and password. "Oh."

Tina leaned over her friend's shoulder, her eyes grew with each wall post she read.

_I'd die too if you were my child. _

_What? No lame ass video to post of you grieving for your parents death?_

_Manhands can't even bring herself to post on facebook. _

_Glad you've left New York for good, RuPaul! _

"Oh Rachel, I'm so sorry."

"Nothing I'm not used to." She quickly logged out, unable to read the horrible comments from her former peers that she'd mostly managed to escape since moving to Lima.

* * *

><p>"Uh Puck?"<p>

Puck raised a brow and pulled his head from his locker and looked to the source of the voice, "uh hey Tina, 'sup?"

"I need your help with something," she paused, "it has to do with Rachel."

"I'm listening."

"You have to come with me to the library."

"What the fuck? Is this some kind of library intervention that my girlfriend set you up to?"

Tina shook her head, "no, but I wouldn't put that past Rachel."

"So what is it, then?"

Tina and Puck settled into the corner of the computer lab, there were just a few students in the lab and thankfully none of them had paid any attention to them. Tina quickly went to facebook, "so Rachel and I were in computer lab today and I asked her about facebook, she mentioned she hadn't been on it since before her parents died and when she did login…" Tina typed in the password and rolled the chair back a bit so Puck could see the screen.

"What the fuck?" Puck's anger boiled at the comments written all over Rachel's wall.

"My thoughts exactly." Tina started to log out of Rachel's facebook but stopped the cursor over the little x in the right corner of the screen when Puck protested.

"Can you delete the comments? And go to my profile, add me as a friend, I'm gonna show these fuckers what's up."

Tina nodded, "I bet we can get the whole glee club to friend Rachel on facebook and we can show all of her former classmates how amazing she is!"

Puck nodded his head in approval, "You know, I like the way you think." He stood up and tossed his bag back over his shoulder, "Oh and Cohen-Chang?" Tina looked back up, "one of these days you're going to teach me how to hack facebook accounts."

"Uh...ok."

* * *

><p>"You should totally become a cheerio," Santana said out of nowhere as the group of girls roamed the mall.<p>

Rachel shook her head, "I think I'll pass."

Quinn raised a brow and looped her arm through Rachel's, "you've been kind of quiet, everything ok?"

"Did Puckerman screw up again?"

"No, no, Noah has been nothing but wonderful to me, it's just been a long day."

Santana smirked, not entirely believing Rachel's reason but going with it, "the Monday after a crazy weekend always is a long day."

"Hey girls!" Kurt practically skipped over to the three, Mercedes lingering behind him. "Should have told me you were all going shopping, I've been trying to convince Rach to let me buy her some new jeans."

"I agreed to no such thing," Rachel protested.

"Well you should." Everybody turned to Mercedes and she shrugged, "well she's got that perfect figure. Plus we know Puck would be drooling at the sight of Rachel in jeans."

Santana rolled her eyes, "Ok, let's move past that this little awkward moment, shall we? Here's the plan, we're starting at Forever 21 then we'll head straight to the second level. No complaints?" Santana didn't even wait for a response, "good. Let's go, we have a movie to attend to after this."

* * *

><p>Rachel jumped as the strong arms slipped around her waist, "hey babe, you look fucking amazing." His breath tickled her skin and she relaxed in his arms. He briefly slipped his hands into the front pockets of the skinny jeans she was trying on. "Totally shows off your cute little ass."<p>

"Thank you, I think." She turned around in his arms and tried to ignore the several pairs of eyes watching them. "What are you doing here? I know the mall isn't exactly your place."

"Just hanging with the guys at the arcade." He turned his head to follow Rachel's gaze and rolled his eyes. "Come on," he led her into the changing room and kicked the door shut behind them.

"Noah!" Rachel shrieked. "They'll think we're doing something completely inappropriate!"

"Maybe we should," he dipped his lips to hers and pressed her up against the wall.

Rachel pulled away and looked down, "I'm serious."

Puck sighed and stepped back, "fine. Didn't think giving my girl a kiss was considered inappropriate."

"It's not, but it could lead to inappropriate things." She motioned with her hands for him to turn around, "I need to change back into my skirt." When he turned around, she slipped out of the jeans and back into skirt. "I'm finished."

"Shoulda waited until I left, now people are going to think we did do something inappropriate." He turned around, his hands stuffed in his pockets and a hint of smirk playing at his lips.

Rachel busied herself by folding the jeans, "people have always talked a lot about me. It is so horrible of me to want to avoid even more gossip formulating about me?"

"Most of it is a bunch of shit." Puck pulled Rachel to him, "fuck, Rach, I saw your facebook." She broke eye contact and tried to remove herself from his grasp but he wasn't having it. "I don't know why you do this to yourself. You know, let people put you down and just take it. Fuck, Rach, you're awesome. You shouldn't have to take shit like that."

"Well words are nothing compared to some things that have occurred in the past."

"Like what?"

She shook her head, "it's not important."

Someone pounded on the fitting room door, "hey you two, we've got other things to do than to wait on you guys!" Of course it was Santana.

Puck rolled his eyes, "then get on with it!"

"But Rach promised she'd go to the movies with us," Brittany spoke softly from the other side of the door.

Rachel nodded, "I did. And I'd really like to go."

"Ok, ok," he took her hands in his and tugged them, "keep your window open tonight, k?"

"I will."

"And Rachel?"

"Yeah?"

"You've got cute hands."

She couldn't help the slight blush, "yeah?" she smiled at the adjoined hands, "you're not as badass as one would think, Noah Puckerman."

"Babe, I'm a total badass, just wait, when we go to New York for Nationals, those punk ass bitches will find out just how badass Rachel Berry's boyfriend is."

"Seriously guys!" Quinn yelled, "the movie starts in twenty minutes and you know how hard it is to find good seats on an opening night?"

"Ok, ok," Rachel called, "we're coming!"


	12. Chapter 12

_Sorry for the long wait, I hope everybody is having a good new year! I would really like to individually reply to each review but I've been so thin on time lately. But just so we're all clear, I appreciate all reviews. :) I hope this chapter was worth the wait._

Chapter Twelve

In a World Full of People

One by one, the glee club piled onto the handicap accessible bus that they had rented out for their trip. Rachel stopped to slip into a seat halfway through the bus when Puck nudged her to keep going, "all the way to the back," he whispered in her ear.

She grinned, every day she was feeling more and more comfortable with the affection he was showing towards her, "as long as I'm still guaranteed the window seat."

"It's cool, don't need to look out the window when I've got a view like you right next to me."

"Oh gag me," Santana muttered from behind them.

"Shut it, Satan." Puck threw over his shoulder, "this is tame compared to the way you and Evans go at it!"

Rachel didn't say anything in response to either one of them, but the red that crept into her cheeks was enough. She slid into the seat and settled her purse in front of her feet. Puck settled in next to her and casually draped his arm over her shoulders.

Once everybody had taken their seats, Mr. Schuester did a quick head count and double checked that everybody was in attendance. "Ok guys!" Unfortunately for him, his students were already chatting with one another again. He rolled his eyes, "hey!" He smiled when they all looked up, "as I was saying, we really need to be on our best behavior on this trip-"

"Ah come on, Mr. Schue, we're always on our best behavior!"

"Yeah!" Mike agreed, "What happened last year was just a big misunderstanding."

Artie nodded, "word. Those guys from Carmel were whacked out and made a ton of false accusations."

"Yeah!" Finn nodded his head, "they didn't have proof, Mr. Schue!"

"Regardless, you guys are not going to find yourself in a situation like that again, are you?" The students exchanged glances with one another, "_are you?_" Satisfied with the chorus of no's, he clapped his hands together, "well then let's get on the road!"

Immediately after Mr. Schue took a seat, Rachel turned to her boyfriend, "what sort of trouble did you guys find yourself in last year?"

Mercedes rolled her eyes from the seat across the aisle she was sharing with Kurt. Over the past few weeks, the tensions between her and Rachel had started to die down. There was still some diva behavior that emerged from the both of them on occasion, but both had compromised to put aside their differences for glee club and their mutual friends.

"Some bitches messed with my girl Tina." Mercedes shook her head, "it wasn't cool."

Rachel twisted around so she could see Tina in the seat behind her, "what happened?"

Tina didn't feel comfortable with the sudden attention on her, "well you know," she shrugged, "Carmel High's glee club is very well known…"

"Yes, I do know, my glee club from New York competed against them in Nationals last year," Rachel said in her matter of fact tone. "Please, continue your story, what happened?"

Kurt shuddered, "I'm sure it's still traumatizing for Tina to think about."

"No," Tina stuttered, "it's ok." She turned back to Rachel, "I just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. They feathered me."

"Feathered you?"

Quinn nodded sympathetically, "she ran back to the girls' restroom to get her purse that she'd left and when she didn't come back we went looking for her…"

"Those bitches attacked her with feathers, glitter and some kind of disgusting mushy substance to make it all stick!" Santana cursed in Spanish, "they had to pay, nobody messes with my teammates and friends!" She shook her head, "no me gusta."

Rachel was angered by the behavior of another glee team, "that's horrible!" She stopped and suddenly remembered Mr. Schuester's words, "wait, what did you guys do?"

Matt chuckled, "what didn't we do is more like it."

"Noah?"

Puck smirked, "we slashed the tires on their bus."

"Stole their mascot," Sam added.

"Guys!" Mr. Schue interrupted. "That's enough."

* * *

><p>"We won!"<p>

Everybody seemed to be repeating it over and over, almost like they were just waiting for someone to tell them they were wrong; that they hadn't won. They had decided against using _Don't Stop Believing, _and instead taking Rachel's suggestion of Mika's _We Are Golden_ as their big group number. They'd done a final vote and chosen Rachel as their solo performer, and their third number was a mash-up of Jon McLaughlin's _Beautiful Disaster _and Kelly Clarkson's _Beautiful Disaster. _

Mr. Schuester was the last to enter their temporary dressing room, grinning ear to ear, he held up the first place trophy, "we did it!"

Santana nodded, "mhm, that's right, we _are _golden, bitches!"

Rachel grinned and looked up at Puck, she wrapped her arms around him, "isn't it amazing, Noah?"

He smirked and slipped his arm around her waist, "we couldn't have done it without you, babe."

"While I do take pride in coming up with a fantastic arrangement for _We Are Golden _that showcased all of our voices, I do believe you guys would have come up with a winning performance without me."

"I doubt it."

More than a few people stopped their celebrations and looked to Mercedes. She smiled and shrugged her shoulders, "I guess I kind of owe you an apology."

"It's not necessary, you had every right to be…"

"I had no right to treat you so poorly. You're amazing, Rachel. I guess I was just jealous of you; of your voice and how close you were growing to my best friends. But I know now you're not trying to take anything away from me. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I am sorry." She smiled, "Us divas should really stick together, right?"

Rachel broke out into a huge grin, "I couldn't agree more." She stepped a bit closer, "I'm going to hug you now, is that ok?"

"Oh!" Brittany clapped her hands, "I wanna hug you guys, too!" She threw her arms around the girls and the three of them erupted in giggles.

Grinning, Tina joined the three girls, "your solo was amazing, Rach."

Kurt nodded, "only you would have been practicing _Don't Rain on My Parade _since you were four."

"Group hug!" Matt exclaimed.

Rachel laughed, tears of mixed emotions falling freely, as dozen pair of arms engulfed her.

"We're gonna take a tumble!" Someone yelled.

Sure enough, the members of the glee club fell to the floor, laughing in celebration of their win.

* * *

><p>"Oh no," Rachel squeezed her eyes shut and braced herself against the seat in front of her, "no, no, no." The bus jerked again and she could hear screams and yells from her friends echoing through her eardrums. Their voices were far away and extremely close at the same time, she knew she was having a panic attack.<p>

She could feel someone trying to grab a hold of her, their fingertips constantly grazing her body but unable to make a complete grasp with each sudden movement the bus made.

There was a loud thump and the brakes squeaked, the tires spinning against the wet road and after what seemed like a lifetime, the bus came to a stop in the shallow ditch off the interstate.

"Breathe," Puck instructed, pulling her away from the seat and making her lean forward. "Just-"

_Boom._

The bus jerked forward and screams from the passengers were muffled by crunching metal and screeching brakes; the sudden impact of whatever had hit the bus knocked it on its side. The bus once again came to a halt and the screams died down. Everybody was silently bracing themselves for another crash.

But nothing happened and everybody lifted their heads up from cover and looked towards each other, silently making sure everybody was ok.

"Is everybody alright?" Mr. Schue called somewhere towards the front of the bus. There were a few forced replies, several groans and more than a few curse words that fell from a certain Latina cheerleader's mouth.

"What the fuck just happened?"

"We crashed, you idiot."

"No shit, Sherlock."

"Guys, guys, now is not the time. I need to make sure everybody is ok."

"Can someone…" a sharp breath was taken, "remove ouch…the restraints?"

"I think my ankle is broken."

"I don't think my arm is supposed to bend like this."

"Oh shit, your head is gushing blood!"

"My head hurts."

"Oh no, this isn't good."

For safety reasons, they'd all made their way out of the overturned bus and were huddled a safe distance away from the death trap. A few of them had more serious injuries and Mr. Schue had been on his cell trying to instruct the dispatcher just where they had crashed. Apparently after hydroplaning off the highway and coming to a stop in a ditch, a chain reaction of sorts happened and three more vehicles followed suit. A dump truck had run into the side of the bus, causing it to roll over.

Drivers from all the other vehicles seemed ok…except for the dump truck driver. Mr. Schue had quickly instructed his students to look away, but it was too late, they all saw the lifeless body lying just feet away from them.

Puck slipped out of his letterman jacket and draped it over Rachel's shoulders, "stay awake, babe. The ambulance should be here soon."

Puck's eyes drifted to the cut on the side of Rachel's head, she was holding his hat to the wound and applying pressure just like he had instructed her to do; but he could see the blood slowly creeping through the knitted yarn.

"I don't want you to get cold," she whispered.

"You're keeping me warm," he pulled her into his lap, mindful of other possible injuries she might have obtained. Her breathing started to slow and he could feel her body losing focus, "talk to me, you have to stay awake."

"But I'm tired."

"I know, but you might have a concussion." He turned her body so she was facing him, "tell me something."

"Tell you what?"

"Anything," he insisted. "Anything that keeps your mind going."

She closed her eyes but opened them immediately when she felt his nudge, "do you think they were watching me?"

He didn't have to ask her to clarify, "course they were. They were probably sitting front and center." He kissed her forehead, "you made them proud, baby."

"It hurts," she cried.

Puck pulled away enough to look down at her and see the big tears threatening to fall. "What hurts? Does something else hurt?"

"I want to be with them, Noah."

"Rachel I…" his body straightened when he heard the wail of the sirens. "About fucking time," he growled, looking up and seeing the several ambulances speeding down the highway and heading in their direction. He moved her enough to stand up and then hoisted her up in his arms, "keep the hat on your cut, k?"

"Mmk." Her eyes started to roll back and she could faintly hear Puck's frantic voice before it faded away completely.

* * *

><p>Rachel, Artie, Quinn, Tina and Finn were the only ones with severe enough injuries to be transported to Lima General Hospital. The rest of the kids had been checked out by the paramedics and were free to go home. But they'd become such a tight family over the past few months, all of them had insisted on going to the hospital to be with the others.<p>

Puck had secluded himself in the corner of the waiting room and kept his head down, waiting for someone to come through and tell him how Rachel was. They'd gotten encouraging news on everyone else but the only thing they had heard about Rachel was her emergency surgery for internal bleeding.

After some x-rays on her ankle, Quinn was relieved to find out it wasn't broken but just sprained. With a pair of crutches and some pain medicine, she was free to go. She'd had a very loud argument with her mother in the waiting room about staying and waiting to see how Rachel was doing. It was only after the interference of both Puck's mom and Rachel's aunt, did Quinn agree to go home.

Finn on the other hand, wasn't as fortunate, his right arm, his throwing arm, was now in a cast and his high school football career was over. He'd be as good as new in time, and it wasn't like McKinley's football team was going anywhere, but it still sucked. He also knew he didn't have a future as a football player, but there's still that feeling of something so precious being ripped from your grasp. He'd be on the bench for the last three games.

Artie had a few sore ribs, but thankfully none were broken. He was released and his mother had taken him straight home; despise his protests to wait and see how everybody else was doing.

Next to Rachel, Tina had the next serious injury. It was almost a freak accident, really. She fell from her seat as the bus skidded across the highway and somehow their trophy fell to the aisle and rolled down, smacking her in the head. Thankfully, Tina was fine and would be staying the night just for observation; she was the only other passenger who had sustained a concussion.

"Family for Rachel Berry?"


End file.
